19. Footprints

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The footprints on the Moon will be there for 100 million years.

I wonder if the two initials engraved into the tree will last even longer.

H and L.

We did it the summer before mum died. I told Louis I didn’t want to hurt the tree. He said it wouldn’t hurt, it’d just burn a little. As if you cut your finger a bit.

He did it for me anyways. I don’t like hurting stuff.

We’re sitting under the tree again. Louis’ hair is all wet from showering. It looks very pretty.

I’m  not supposed to find boys pretty, am I?

But every time I touch myself, all I can think about is Louis, Louis, Louis. Upper arms, tummy, chest, muscles.

It’s probably so, so wrong.

Maybe I should ask dad if it’s wrong to find boys pretty. I wonder what he’d say.

“Harry?”, Louis asks and I blink a thousand times to get the imagine of him without a shirt on out of my head.

“Yes?”

“Do you think we can still climb up there?”, he asks.

I nod. “But no jumping anymore.

“I liked your galaxy ankle though.”

I giggle. He laughs. He’s funny. I like the way his laugh sounds.

I don’t laugh often. Louis makes me bubble with happiness.

We climb up the tree. It’s not as high anymore. I really did get a lot taller.

“I bet you can even touch the clouds from that tree”, I say, pointing to the highest tree in the forest.

“Maybe they’re made out of candy after all.”

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