Peashooter x Reader (Plants vs Zombies Franchise)

There's a Plant in Your House!

As you storm inside, you immediately head straight for your living room, where you turn on the tv for Family Guy, so you can see that hoodwink Meg Griffin get blasted into pieces. Near the start of your Family Guy marathon, you decide it's a good idea to set up some sort of job profile to see if you could find some sort of way to pay bills. Eventually, some sort of position for you will be offered.

You still had that chill of being watched by that plant thing. You were sitting right next to the glass sliding door, so you went to go cover that with drapes. Peering through the glass was the strange plant, walking over towards you. Not thinking how it grew legs, or how it had an annoyed expression, you close the blinds without a second thought.

Just as you go back to sit down the sliding door practically forces itself open, and the drapes flying to the side. There stood the same plant, about eye-level to you in height. Their mouth-like maw faced directly towards you, like a gun being pointed to your forehead. But yet, you couldn't fix your eyes off of their hot hourglass bod. You quickly fix yourself off of the couch, stepping back towards the front exit, slowly. But before you could make much of an escape, the pea-eyed man would slam you against the wall in a chokehold with a surprisingly strong grip, especially for his stature.

"Care to explain why the fuck you dumped that nasty-ass concoction over my head, then almost knock me right the fuck out?" He said, firmly.

As much as you would have loved to explain yourself, you're being held at the neck. You couldn't spare an extra short breath of air.

"Now, I'd like for you to try that type of shit again."

That's what he said before slamming you right down face-first on the weathered wooden floorboards. Your nose would start to bleed from the impact.

You try to stand back up, but your arms are shaking like a popsicle stick house in a hurricane. Before you can even get to your knees, a large, heavy object gets launched right onto your upper spine, causing both a loud cracking sound and you to get knocked out.

---

You wake up. You're still on the cold floorboards of the living room, colder than the night, which is what it was outside. All of the lights had been turned off, except for the tv. It was on this strange news channel. It said that it had a breaking news segment in just a few minutes. You bring yourself back to your feet, only now noticing the kickball-sized pea on the floor. Next to you. This is what must've hit you from behind, it has to be some kind of miracle that you don't have any paralysis, but the sharp pain was very apparent.

You make your way to the couch, not too far from where you fell, and glance back up to the tv. It now had a green-skinned man seated at a news desk. You didn't notice his green skin first, rather their huge, bulbous forehead highlighted in pink on the top, supposedly a result of being fried from the sun, or the amount of thoughts that go through his head. Also still very possible that the green face paint had already been wearing off.

The newsman would interrupt your thought process, chiming in and saying: "Greetings viewers, I am Doctor Edgar Zomboss, here for your 12:00p.m. breaking news. You see, being a Neighborville local news source, there's always something new at 12:00p.m.. There has been talks of a new brain-having sap walking among us! While we cannot be certain of their whereabouts, it is probable that they reside over in the old Crazy Dave residence. If any of you brainless chaps could be of some use to me, you'll stick it out to find out where they are when they don't have any of those deplorably unappetizing plants around. I-, We, could finally secure our first brain since forever ago! Now, if I don't see utter uprising on the streets, I'll surely not be mellow with any of you. Now off with all of you! Find this human, and claim their brain!"

That announcement would abruptly end after the last words of the reporter were said. Some strange advertisements would come up, one most notably for a football target dummy, for practicing tackles. Looks nothing like a real football star, but it'd look like it'll function just well.

But that announcement looks kind of serious for you. The last humans you saw were the movers from earlier, and only now you can't be sure if they were actually human. The whole thing about zombies must've been true, as hard as it is to believe. This is some kind of ghost town, populated by nothing except its former residents, who are now the zombies. Whomever this Edgar guy thinks he is, he's their leader of some kind.

You glance over to the large pea on the floor. Maybe, just maybe, if that guy doesn't try to paralyze you from the waist down again, you may have some sort of a way to fight off a horde of zombies. You'd go out to search for him, but knowing that there could be a bajillion zombies out on the street, you decide against it. Instead, you hastily go to close all of the drapes in the house.

But, when you go to close one facing the backyard from your bedroom, you see something staring right back at you from the mild darkness. It didn't look like the plant guy, but they were still putridly green. Whatever, or whoever, was in your yard, is trying to get in from your back door, and winning at it. Mustn't have locked it when you left the living room.

Whatever it is, someone else's in your house now.