[Venice; a street]
(Enter Antonio and Bassanio).
Antonio: I'm so sad!
Bassanio: What's wrong? It's such a happy day, check out the sky, the ocean!
Antonio: Yeah, you're right. Just...forget about it. Anyway, how's Portia? Haven't heard about her in a while.
Bassanio: *Turns red* Portia is fine, yeah. But, listen. I sort of need money. I can't woo her without money. Can you lend me some, please?
Antonio: *Pissed off* You're always after my money, dude! Just, what the fuck, even? You're taking me for what? Your personal ATM?
Bassanio: *Frantic*
No, no, dude!
Listen to me!
It's Portia, the very rich heiress!
That's why I want your money! Think of it as an investment.
Antonio: *Ponders* Rich, you say?
Bassanio: Very!
Antonio: And our shares would be?
Bassanio: You, forty percent. Myself, sixty, of course!
Antonio: Fuck you, bitch. Go to hell.
Bassanio: Okay, okay. Relax, dude. Fifty-fifty?
Antonio: Now, we're talking!
*Grins*
Let's go to Shylock, the moneylender. I don't have money, as of now.
(Exit, Antonio and Bassanio).
