The Cathabella Diary | Novella

04.02.22

I woke up into a bright morning, squinting at the sharp beams of the sun as it had been slipping past the curtains onto my face. I had a good night's sleep after a tiring day yesterday. I had been on a tour of the ship the other night which had been quite satisfactory. Not that I was interested in any of the luxuries; I wanted to see if the money charged makes up to its reputation. Had never heard of some ship like The Cathabella but I didn't know much of the shipping industry either. But this ship is a good hotel-on-water for me.

But I still had not got rid of the question behind the fireworks. What was the occasion? That made me feel more forlorn about my social indulgence. I had been more into my business since the arrival of the recession. You just can't pull your head away when you are in the middle of a chaos and the only means of your survival is jerking your head in, putting in your intelligence.

As I got up, I had my morning chores done and had me ordered a good cup of filtered coffee. I had been halfway through it when there was a knock at my door. I glanced up at the mahogany-rimmed wall clock which displayed 9:52. I walked up to the door and as I opened it, I got a hint to my question.

It was a boy in his mid-twenties – perhaps on an internship trip – holding out an envelope to me. For a moment I seemed to ask him about the occasion but I resisted somehow. As I took it and closed the door behind me, I opened the envelope and pulled out a golden sheet of paper. It was inviting me for a grand party on the deck tomorrow afternoon. It had a title of – 'Recommencement celebration'. Recommencement? I had to attend it to know what it was for. So, I slipped it into my coat-pocket and finished my tea. The nausea had still not cent per cent gone though.

I dared myself to go up to the bow this time. The idea sounded crazy to me. What would happen if I end up puking there? Of course, someone ahead (by chance) will have an impression of a yellow inscription just under the bow. He may admire it for its uniqueness from a distance but as he comes closer, it starts to gross him out at again, its uniqueness, to a point he does it himself. So, I decided to wait. To let this feeling go away. But again, had I not spent my night roaming around the other night? Oh yes, but I wasn't sure about the morning. I was feeling better than the other night.

I started roaming around the lounge. I got myself seated on a couch after a while and went on reading some magazines and articles for another three quarters of an hour. But the truth was – I was bored. Away from my business, away from my family, away from any stress – that was a rarity. Me being away from both my family and enterprise has not happened for years now. I started feeling gauche.

After being done with the newspaper, I walked down again into my room and pulled out my cell phone just before getting in. There was no signal. On my way back, I had seen some telephone booths. I wanted to talk to somebody but I didn't know who to call. Alex would be busy and he was more of a business partner than a friend. Thinking of Aly – I don't suppose she would like to talk to me. No matter whatever we had, it never gratified her. She always wanted me to be with her but I had been tired of telling her the same thing again and again – I have my business and I have to work for it no matter what. I am making a sacrifice. For us.

I am not concerned about Aly. She has been a mess and has put me in mess. It's better if we separate. I certainly ain't going to talk to her. I am worried about Nancy anyway. A little girl she is.

I reached out to the front door of my room and when my hand was on the knob, I sighed and pulled back. Nothing seemed to be working for my pleasure. I am better a busy man than a free one. Nonetheless, I went in – to fetch myself a book I had brought myself to read. Grabbing it, I went back out and started up the stairs to the swimming pool. It was close to noon and the sun was up above. It was not hurting though. I got myself sitting on a pool chair by the pool, where some children had been playing, and went on reading the book for the next four hours. The book was I was reading – Misery ­­– was quite an engaging one.

There were still some seventy pages left when I got up and stretched myself. I have had enough of it for the time being. The climax was midway but I felt tired. What a shame! The pool was empty now but there were still people around – on the chairs, scaling and enjoying the horizon. I got up and looked around. There were people everywhere – enjoying, playful... with their family. Most of them were rich people on a holiday trip. There were 953 people aboard, I had heard the other day.

With no family or friend around and on your own on a ship for an 8-day trip, it got me contemplating on my decision. I had come to witness the seas, to see its beauty... but now here I was... alone in my quarter, sitting by the porthole with the curtains off and nauseating at only a measly reminiscence of waters with a new question –

Did I get overwhelmed? Should I have stuck to the air and minded my own business?