Dirty (Seulrene Fanfiction)

-14-

Love yourself

"I've never really given you much thought before."

I shrugged lazily at the candid statement, drawing long, satisfying drags from the blackening joint before passing it along to the stocky figure currently hunched beside me.

Seungyoon and I took refuge in the secluded alleyway where we could enjoy the peace and solitude of the isolated location while the ginger hues of the sun bathed us in its splendor.

A few months ago, the very idea of getting high and cordial with fucking Kang Seungyoon would have had me barfing out my intestines from disgust.

But here we were—sitting shoulder to shoulder—completely vulnerable to each other.

And I was surprisingly...relaxed with him of all people.

What a fucking crazy world.

"I mean, I knew of you and would notice you briefly in passing from time to time, but you mostly kept to yourself," Seungyoon rephrased while taking a quick puff off the joint and then handing it back to me, hazy eyes trained intently up at the vast sky above. "Until that day in the gym, you weren't really on my radar."

"What would the reason be for the weird loner girl to be on your radar?" I chuckled through an inhale of smoke that tickled the back of my throat with a light burn. "You certainly were on mine though."

His neck craned sluggishly in my direction.

"Yeah?"

I nodded.

Primarily, it was due to my deep-seated, unhealthy jealousy of him and Irene that sprang him to my attention in the first place.

But for the sake of the easy-toned conversation—and in avoidance of being the first to bring up Irene—I decided to omit this minor detail.

"It's hard to miss the King of Horangi," I said, a tad surprised to hear him laughing softly in response.

"What a stupid title," He scoffed while gently sloping his head back against the bricked wall. "I'm the king of nothing..."

"Literally everyone in our class would disagree," I refuted.

He plucked the joint from my fingers and took a hard drag, pupils dilating upon inhale.

"It's pretty shitty how we have so many labels stamped on us this young," He complained, his tone strained and wooden. "It's just high school and yet everyone acts like these times shape our lives...like it's the only thing that'll ever matter."

Quite true, actually.

The high school experience served only as an outline to prepare us for the future.

Even at my young age, I could recognize the insignificance of adolescent matters which pale in comparison to those encountered during adulthood.

I caught a brief glimpse of this mirrored through Kyungri—tasted its brutal bitterness unprimed.

It was absurd to even think high school could be credited for anything beyond flimsy memories that most of us would much rather forget anyway.

So, who really gives a fuck?

"We all hone the potential to be greater than the shadows we leave behind in high school," Seungyoon continued in a dazed slur. "And yet, we choose to be chained to stereotypes...it's so stupid..."