You Just Don't Get It

3.

it was a few hours later and Meredith was finally asleep, Meredith protested for a while but she eventually went down.

Arizona had also noticed that Derek hadn't stopped by once to check on Meredith or the baby. she knew everyone was busy and there was a lot to do, but even she had made it to check on Meredith and Cristina had also stopped by once or twice and made sure Meredith's vitals were fine while she was asleep.

but not once did Derek stop by. the baby had stayed asleep in the amount of time Meredith was asleep but he did wake up once for a diaper change but once he had a clean diaper and a full stomach he was down again.

Arizona was still worried about Meredith even though Meredith made it very clear that she was perfectly fine, but Meredith was never the kind of person who asked for help when she needed it.

she would rather let herself die before ever asking for help, maybe it's because she was scared that if she did no one would be there to help her, like how no one helped her when she was a child.

she was always alone and she got used to it... and now in Meredith's mind, she will always be alone, no matter how many people she had in her life that loved her, no matter how many times people said it or showed... deep down she would always be alone because there was no one who truly understood her.

Cristina had always done her best as Meredith's person but she never felt what Meredith felt, she didn't have an easy childhood either but her pain wasn't the same as Meredith nor was it anywhere near similar to Meredith's.

Cristina didn't have the best relationship with her mother but her mother had never once told her that she regretted having her as Ellis did Meredith.

there was nothing anyone could do to help Meredith unless she allowed it, and Meredith would never allow anyone to help her unless she was unconscious and it was the legal thing to do.

Arizona knew things could only get worse from where they already were. Meredith was going to be going home in a few days but once she was home and everyone was working there was no way Meredith would get help then.

she needed to take advantage of it while Meredith was still stuck in a hospital bed.

if Meredith went home without getting any help she would let motherhood eat her alive until she couldn't even remember if she had a C-section.

and then when she was cleared to come back to work she would throw herself in that, leaving no time for herself and then after work she would take care of her kids and by the end of the day, there would be no time to talk about how she really felt about everything. Derek and Meredith would both be tired from work and it would never cross their minds to talk about any of it.

Arizona was almost positive that Derek didn't even know about what Meredith was truly going through. it would be hard for him to know if Meredith never said, especially considering he was never around.

maybe he was throwing himself into work to not have to think about it, to save himself from the pain of looking at Meredith not knowing how to help her.

but staying quiet and not being around was the last thing Meredith needed and it was also the number one thing Meredith wanted.

but this wasn't about Derek, yes, she was going to have to have a long conversation with Derek about this but she would do that later, the first thing she needed to do was try and figure out how to get Meredith to talk to her.

---

after some time, while Arizona was reading a book she heard the doorknob twist before the door opened and Derek walked in.