Wanting To Be With Them, No Matter What

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Belly and I were sitting in the kitchen when my mom walked in. I had a bowl of Honey-nut Cheerios with no milk, and Belly had who knows what.

"Hi." Belly said, my mom, didn't see us before that so she jumped.

"Jesus! What are you girls doing here?" She puts a hand on her chest and comes to a halt. She also had somewhat of a glow...

"I'm just having some cereal before I go for a swim." Belly nods.

"I wanted to go see fireworks but changed my mind," I added. After Jere and I stood in silence in the hallway he told me Steven had left. He asked for some alone time and I left him to that. "Where were you?" I ask my mom.

She sighed, "Just went for a drive." I didn't believe that. She opened a cabinet and got out a cup.

"Aren't you gonna yell at me?" Belly asks her. She sighs again, turning around to face us both.

"Do you want me to yell at you?" She asks, she had a smirk playing on her lips.

"No." Belly laughs. I smile. "What I want is to go back in time so that I didn't barge in on Conrad in the shower." Hmm. She did too.

"Was he naked?" I ask, pretending like the same thing didn't happen to me.

"No, he was wearing a bathing suit." Belly responds, looking down at her bowl. "But, I did tell him that he looks very romantic with wet hair." I tried to hold in my laugh but I couldn't. It burst out. My mom gave me a look.

"I'm sorry- I-I'm sorry." I try to stop laughing. I couldn't tell if I was laughing at the fact that Belly and I liked the same thing about Conrad, or if it was the fact she actually said it out loud.

"I hope Cam wasn't there for that." My mom sips her water.

"Thank God, no." Belly smiles. "Oh, but he's probably mad at me too." She pauses. "I'm never drinking again."

"I'm gonna make hang-over soup." My mom says as Belly lays her head on the counter. "You can have it for breakfast." She starts grabbing the ingredients around the kitchen.

"I don't know if I feel like.... like fireworks with Cam. Did you feel them with Devin, at least?" She asks me. "Never mind." She says with wide eyes, remembering what she exposed about him earlier.

I strained a smile, "No, it's fine. I did. I really did. But Bells, if you don't feel like Cam's the one it's okay to just have it as a summer thing, or shut it down now. What I felt for Devin, which a part of me still does, was safe. Like a cozy campfire. I felt like if he was with me, nothing bad could happen. I was wrong though." I laugh slightly.

"Wait, what happened with Devin?" My mom asks.

"He's just, not the one." I sigh. I don't want the news of what happened to get to Susannah, and Jere if he doesn't know. I also know based on a past experience, what this house would do if someone messed with Belly and I. One time, i boy grabbed my wrist at the pier, really wanting me to ride the tower of terror with him, Conrad witnessed it and soon everyone knew, and they showed up to his house the next day.

"But that wasn't enough?" Belly asks me, continuing the topic of Devin.

"No, apparently not." I shrug. It's not like it was on me.

Belly turns to my mom, "Have you ever felt fireworks for anybody, Mom?"

"Once," She replies, "but it was never going to work out. The fire would've burned us both alive." She continues to set up the soup.

"But it... it didn't work out with Dad, either, so how-how do you know when it's the right person?" Belly asks. Jeez, this girl was full of questions. My mom shook her head. I heard and saw the colors of the fireworks glazing in on the room.

"You'll know when you want to be with that person no matter what. Too hot, too safe... you won't care." She smiles at us both. "It'll just feel..."

"Right," I say. We sit there in silence until I notice the bow on my mom's dress is untied. "Um, your bow is untied."

"Ooh. Umm..." My mom mumbles as she ties it up. Did she get fucked?

"Love you, mom." Belly and I say in unison.

"Love you, girls, too." She sighs. We both get up and leave the kitchen. Belly decides to not swim tonight. Her head hurts too much.

"Swim for me, will you?" She asks.

"Yeah, yeah, sure." I nod. I get into my bikini and grab a towel.

When I get outside I see Conrad alone on the dock. The fireworks are still going. I sigh. Suddenly my feet are moving away from the pool and towards the dock. I come up beside him.

"So... I'm sorry if it seems like I hate you this summer, it just feels like you hate me." I slightly chuckle. We needed to clear this thick air. Summer was halfway over already.

"Who could ever hate you?" He asks, looking down at me.

I laugh, "So I think my mom just got railed."

"What? By who?" He laughs, suddenly very much interested.

"I don't know." I shake my head.

"Wow, go Laurel." He looks back up at the fireworks. After a couple of seconds of silence, he says, "May, about the necklace..."

"Um, I'm sorry I brought it up."

"No, no. I um, did get it for you." I don't know if it was just me but I think his face got closer to mine.

"Then why didn't you give it to me?" I ask, in almost a whisper.

"I don't know," he whispers back. "I got embarrassed, I guess."

"Why?"

"May, you don't know the effect you have on people." Huh?

I look at him confused, "The effect on people? I don't... I don't know what you're talking about."

"Yeah. You do." We then make intense eye contact. At this moment I wasn't thinking about what happened on the beach, what he said when we got into that fight, or the fact that he didn't tell me about Devin. All I was thinking about was his lips, his lips on mine. He started to lean in, my heart was doing backflips. His lips were a centimeter away when we heard a "zip." noise. We both quickly turned out heads.

"Huh?" I mumbled. It was a firework. It zoomed right past us and exploded into a green sky. I looked back at Conrad, who was looking straight ahead. As I looked away I felt him look at me. But I didn't look back. I bit my lip. Standing there in silence with him.

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