Raven's DarkNess | ✔

Chapter Fifty Three

Taylor and I stared at each other awkwardly for a long time. I couldn't believe the lie that had just escaped my lips.

Taylor scratched the back of his head and then seemed to be muttering to himself when he said, "you don't kiss like a virgin though,"

"Virgins are the best kissers because that's all we do and all we know how to do," I went with the lie. Except it was true, I think. My best kiss was Enzo and he had kissed the life out of me despite being a virgin at the time.

But still, the way the lies came out of my mouth scared even me. I was most certainly not a virgin but I didn't want to pay for this man's favours with sex. I had finally dissociated myself from being an Assassin. If I started selling my body for favours now then I'll just fall right back into that hole that was so hard to crawl out of. That hole that cost me everything.

Raven would sleep with Taylor and others for benefits but Rochelle was classy and more tactful. She didn't need to give rich people access to her body for any benefit.

"You don't believe me?" I played the offensive card.

"It's not that. I'm just wondering if you're saving it for a mate or marriage?"

That was a tricky question to answer. If I said that I was, he might check out thinking I'll never give it up and he was wasting his time with me. All men wanted sex at some point and they lost interest when girls were too rigid. Especially men from Larger non-conservative packs. I've lived in two, I knew their mentality very well. Sex wasn't a taboo here, virginity and holding back was.

"Neither. I just haven't met who it's felt right to lose it to yet. I want it to feel special and stuff. All that jazz," I was honestly lying out of my ass at this point but it was fine because simply put, honesty would not get me anywhere. It would not do anything for me.

"You're so beautiful, how have you not...." He sounded like he was thinking aloud once more.

I shrugged in response because I didn't know what else to say. I regretted lying all of a sudden because if I did end up sleeping with this man then he would know without a shadow of a doubt that I was most certainly not a virgin or anything of that nature. He would probably feel dumb and betrayed.

I shut my eyes when Enzo re-surfaced in my mind once more. The man haunted me every single moment of my life.

I could almost hear him say; You haven't changed one bit, have you Raven? Still a big liar.

"Does me being a virgin bother you?" I had already lied, might as well sell it.

"No," Taylor shook his head. "It's just unexpected because of the pack you are from,"

"Okay," I nodded my head and then Taylor and I bid  each other farewell for the night.

~*~*~

Two months into my relationship with Taylor and we were both laughing over ice-cream when I spotted two familiar faces.

Ronan and Indigo came over to both of us before I even got a second chance to make sure that I was actually seeing them.

"Hello Aoife, it's been a while," Ronan greeted me with a wide smile and arm slung over Indigo's shoulders. Indigo gave me a pinched look with folded arms. She was in a large oversized hoodie and mom jeans, very different from the shawls and tunics she was fond of in Enzo's pack. Despite her pinched look, I saw how her eyes endlessly scanned over my hair and eyes.

"Aoife?" Taylor reacted next to me.

"It's my middle name," I lied once more, completely caught off-guard and Ronan and Indigo looked at each other and shook their heads.