the Devil and the Sea

22| BBQ: Welcome to the dark side

What am I thinking about? I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I need to get drunk as soon as possible so that it is not possible to fulfill everything that my demon is pushing me to do.

Vincent hands me a glass, and I drink the contents immediately to the bottom. Vincent sets the filled glass in front of me again. I'm drinking again. Delicious.

"Busy?" Phil asks me.

I exchange glances with Vincent, and we answer at the same time:

"Yes." Vincent says.

"Not." I say and make eye contact with Vincent, who furrows his brows.

I make a mocking face at Vincent and turn my attention to Phil: he asks me to talk to him, and I leave Vincent's company.

I follow Phil further away from the table towards the sea, and when we find ourselves a few meters from the others, Phil is reclining on the sand almost next to the waves rushing ashore, I sit down next to him.

Fog in my head. Alcohol worked very quickly. Before the mind's eye - dancing flames, reflected in gray-blue eyes.

Through my hazy mind, I hear Phil complaining about Marina in a drunken stupor, but I ignore everything, only nodding my head from time to time.

Why is he telling me this? Are we back at school? I want to get back to Vincent as soon as possible.

It's hard to concentrate on the words that come out of Phil's lips. I look up. Stars. Beautiful stars, the only constant thing in life. No matter what happens, they are always at the top, shining, burning.

"I know that Marina wants to get close to Vincent." Phil says. I don't like the way it sounds.

Not true. It will never happen, I'm sure. Marina won't get Vincent.

Nobody will get him.

Phil looks at me as if he believes that I know something he doesn't and that I will definitely tell him everything.

"Depends on what meaning you put into the word closer," I answer, looking towards the fire.

Vincent called me for a reason. There was some purpose. How can we make sure that we achieve what we have in mind?

"Do you know what's going on between them?" Phil's face is very close, but it's not annoying.

I shrug. There is nothing between Marina and Vincent. Phil is blind if he can't see this.

"Nothing special is going on, they are friends." And I'm sure of it like never before.

Drunk Phil mumbles something under his breath, but I can't make it out.

"... if you didn't have a boyfriend..." he says in a barely audible voice, and I look at him, frozen.

Phil paused, surveying the sea.

Marina...
I...
Phil is married, so what the hell is he doing? Is he ready to cheat on his wife? Perhaps he has already cheated on her while he is here, and maybe even more than once.

None of the guys are worthy of loyalty, they themselves are ready to cheat  at any moment. I remind myself.

Deciding that I misheard at my own expense, I think to ask again, but as soon as I open my mouth, Vincent appears in front of us. I stare at Vincent, trying to see his expression in the semi-darkness.

Phil instantly switches to it:

"Remember what I said?"

"What are you talking about?" Vincent answers and I can hear him smiling.