Chapter Four: New Secrets

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"So?" Steve hums.

"He has tons of secrets." Nat begins slowly.

"Shouldn't he tell me his own secrets?" Steve frowns.

"We've been through this before. He's the type to hide away his secrets. One thing is, he has massive PTSD." Nat sighs.

"Really? What happened?" Steve asks, now intrigued.

"Well, that story, at least, he should tell you. Steve, he lost his left arm. But I shouldn't tell you how." Nat says softly. Steve just stares at her; not knowing what to say.

"Is that why he smokes?" Steve manages to ask and Nat nods.

"The very reason. He gets his smokes off of Hydra." Nat says bitterly, tapping her foot quickly on the floor. Steve huffs and clenches his fists, he already hated Hydra, all the group members.

"Well, I'd better be off. Nice seeing you, Steve. And I wouldn't pull on that thread. His secrets are his, and his only." Nat warns before getting up and sauntering out of Steve's room.

Steve sighs after she leaves, he closes the door behind her. He sits down on his bed and checks his grandfather clock, set against the wall. It was a big gift from his grandpa, who fought the war in the forties.

He picks up his sketchbook and starts to draw what his superhero costume would look like. All the heroes were in charge of their own suits, as long as it went with they're themes.

The blonde ends up with a red-white and- blue suit, with a gleaming white star set on the chest. He sighs and rubs his face with his hands, then messes his hair. He had so many questions about Bucky, and so little answers. He couldn't keep his mind off of him; thinking about him took up most of his time.

Steve shakes his head and gets up, dropping his sketchbook on his bed. He opens the door and walks out, closing it gently behind him. He troops down the stairs, skipping a step.

"Where are you going, Steven?" The headmistress asks, watching him with her steel blue-grey eyes.

"Out, Ms. Hilda." Steve replies, as usual. She asked this all the time hat he left, and he always answered the same way.

"Alright. Be careful, and be back before eleven." She says, she pats him on the head and sends him on his way. Steve quickly walks out the door and sighs, once free of that stuffy building. Ever since his parents died he had been living there, too scared to go out for school. That's why this was his first year.

He walks around town with his hands shoved in his pockets, when he bumps into someone accidentally. He knocks the other guy down to the ground with his shoulder, but it was a total accident.

"Oh, geez. I'm so sorry, are you okay?" Steve asks quickly, extending a hand to the person. It turned out to be Bucky who he knocked down.

"Anyone ever tell you how much of a total ox you are?" Bucky huffs, taking Steve's extended hand and getting up. He rubs the back of his neck and cocks his head at Steve.

"Sorry." Steve says sheepishly, Bucky nods and nudges him lightly.

"Just jokin', Stevie." Bucky muses and Steve nods. The pair walk around, Steve brings up a topic he was curious about.

"Hey, Buck? Why do you put up with Hydra?" He asks carefully, not wanting to sound insensitive or like a jerk.

Bucky is silent for a while, thinking of a proper answer, he was frowning slightly.

"I don't necessarily put up with them. I don't know, I just..." Bucky shakes his head and puts up his defences, his face hardens.

"Why do you want to know? I can take care of myself just fine." Bucky mutters and Steve sighs.

"Just curious." Steve sighs then drops it, understanding that Bucky won't be saying anything more about himself. Nat was right, he's so secretive.

Bucky was silent; jaw set, eyes narrowed, tense. He didn't like this, Steve was starting to wonder. This might not work exactly how he hoped. He never wanted Steve to worry about him, he could handle himself just fine, thank you very much.

They walk along in silence, as usual.

"Well, I gotta get back. Or Ms. Hilda will have my head on a plate." Steve sighs, Bucky looks at him.

"Ms. Hilda?" He asks, frowning. Bucky, of course, didn't know Steve was an orphan.

"Yeah. She's the headmistress at the orphanage." Steve sighs, surprised at himself that he's telling Bucky this.

"You're orphaned?" Bucky says quietly, Steve swallows and nods.

"Mom was a nurse, Dad was a soldier." Steve mumbles. It still hurt to talk about sometimes.

"When did they...?" Bucky trails off, feeling awful.

"When I was six, maybe?" Steve sighs, he rubs his face.

"I'm sorry." Bucky whispers, and he truly meant it. Steve lets out a shuddering breath and nods.

"Thank you." Steve says quietly.

Later Steve heads back home, so does Bucky. He goes back to his house, not that he wanted to though. His parents had split, and his mom was dating a man who beat Bucky. His mom never knew about it because they were both alcoholics, his mom was drunk most if the time. This was one of the many reasons he had PTSD.

He braces himself when he walks into his house, looking around. Wine and beer bottles were strewn around everywhere, their contents spilling out. He sees his mother lying passed out on the couch, her hair messed up and her clothes rumpled. Bucky huffs and goes to head upstairs but his mother's boyfriend steps out of their bedroom.

"Hey, boy, where you been?" He says loudly, somewhat slurring. Bucky nearly swears out loud; he was drunk. And when he was drunk, he was mean.

"Out." Bucky says simply, before starting to charge upstairs. The boyfriend (named Chuck), grabs his arm before he can move. Bucky huffs; here we go.

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