The first girl santa ever

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I follow Bernard as he leads me down a long hallway that twists and turns. After a good ten minutes of walking in silence we are met with a large door. He opens the door and we enter a large room.

"You look distressed Santa." Bernard tells me.

"Distressed? I'm way past distressed. Im talking to an elf and I'm apparently the new Santa!" I shake.

"That's not surprising. Most grown-ups can't believe in magic. It just... sort of grows out of them." He shrugs.

"But how can I be Santa?! I thought only men could be Santa!" I ask.

"I'll have to request Curtis to join us to explain that." He says walking out.

He closes the door behind him and I let out a sigh. He was right about one thing, I am soaked. A towel and a set of monogrammed pajamas are laid on the bed. I take off the coat and the pants, folding them and setting them onto a nearby table. I towel dry my hair and pat dry the rest of my body. Once dry, I change into the pajamas and fold my old clothes, setting them next to the jacket. Sitting onto the bed, I run my hands through my hair. My mind is racing. The door opens and Bernard and another elf walk into the room.

"This is Curtis. He's the keeper of the Santa handbook." Bernard introduces his friend.

"And the elf that's second in command!" Curtis says, chest puffed out with pride.

"Yeah, yeah, now tell her." Bernard pushes Curtis toward me.

"According to the Santa handbook, anyone, regardless of gender, will become Santa if they put on the coat and the previous santa is no more. Furthermore, if the santee is not male, their physical change will be different. Their ears will pointen and their canine teeth will sharpen. The closest male figure in their life will become Santa's helper, their hair will whiten, they will grow a beard and they will have significant weight gain. " Curtis reads out, shutting the large book when finished.

"So, let me get this straight. My dad will look like santa, but I'll be Santa." I rub my head.

"Essentially, yes." Curtis nods.

"This is the first ever case that has been documented in elf history." Bernard chimes in.

"Oh, how amazing!" I flip my back onto the bed, hands covering my face.

"I'll be going now!" Curtis scurry's out.

"If it means anything, I'm sorry you were chosen." Bernard sits next to me.

"Chosen?" I ask.

"Every Santa ever has been chosen by the previous santa. He must have seen something in you that you can't." Bernard explains.

"Well, that's bullshit!" I exclaim.

"Language! But yes it may seem unfair." Bernard scolds me.

"I'm sorry," I say sheepishly.

"It's ok. When you wake up you will be back at home. You have eleven months to get it together." Bernard says before proofing into a cloud of glitter.

"What the fuck?" I whisper to myself.

This has been one long night I think to myself as I drift off into slumber

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I wake up the next morning in my own bed. I stretch and groan, standing up and making my way downstairs. I reach the kitchen and pour myself a cup of iced coffee. Charlie then comes racing down the stairs with dad in tow.

"See! Bernard dropped off gifts!" Charlie exclaims.

"The waiter?" Dad asks.

"No! The elf!" Charlie says sorting through presents.

I guess I did put the presents under the tree last night.

"There's one here for you (y/n)!" Charlie calls out.

I come to see what he's talking about and see a present addressed to me from Bernard. I guess that wasn't a dream after all.

I kneel down and undo the ribbon. Opening the box I see a messenger bag. There is also a note. It reads 'this is an endless bag. Whatever you need will be in it and it has unlimited storage. Take care of it- Bernard'

"Ooh!" Charlie reads the note.

I take the note back and bring the box to my room. As I descend the stairs I hear mom talking to dad.

"(Y/n) is the new Santa, mom!" Charlie jumps.

"How can (y/n) be santa? She isn't a boy." Mom smooths his hair.

"I don't know! Bernard says she's the first one ever!" Charlie says.

"Ok Charlie, you better get to the car. Neil's waiting for you, I'll be there in a moment." Mom ushers him out.

"So, uh, what have you been telling him?" Mom confronts dad.

" Nothing. It's just... I had this really strange dream. And l-- I must have told him all about it." Dad stammers.

I know how to prove to dad that it was real. I rush to the car to see Charlie rolling down the window. Dad follows after me.

"Where did I get the pajamas?" I ask him.

"Bernard gave them to you!" Charlie shakes his hands at me.

"Oh, wait. Wait. Bernard was the name of the waiter at the restaurant last night." Dad remembers.

"Some waiter gave our kid pajamas?" Mom questions.

"What's this all about?" Neil asks Charlie.

"Dad and (y/n) took me to the North Pole, and Larry showed me the workshop!" Charlie says excitedly.

"The North Pole." Neil says flatly.

"Yeah! (Y/n)'s the new Santa! The regular Santa fell off the roof, and they put on the suit." Charlie says exasperated.

"Charlie, we will discuss this at home." Neil says softly.

They drive away and we trudge inside.

"It's just a dream. Stuff like that doesn't happen." Dad says to me.

"Why? Because I'm not a man?" I ask him.

"What? No! Because Santa's not real!" Dad shakes his head.

"Well I guess when you gain weight and I get sharp canines then you'll see." I say climbing the stairs.

He stands baffled at the foot of the stairs. This is just great.

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