Treat you better

Capítulo 56. - Where our dreams come from

Two Months Later

ROSALY

It was almost lunchtime and Rosaly was resting in her hotel room in London, England. Shawn had gone out to rehearse with the band first thing in the morning and promised that he would return to have lunch with her, as he had done since he discovered that she had not been eating right when they were in Portugal, and her tests showed that she was slightly anemic.

He had personally taken care of her diet, making Rosaly respect the right time stipulated by the doctor in which she had to eat and the types of food she had to eat to stay healthy throughout her pregnancy.

Such care sometimes irritated her, because she had the feeling that Shawn was treating her like a child, as if he thought she was incapable of taking care of herself or her child, but then she took into account that she had put herself in that situation, because she had not told Shawn what was happening to her and ended up putting her health and that of their child at risk.

Rosaly understood that he acted this way out of an excess of love and ended up ignoring the messages he sent her thousands of times a day to see if she had taken the medication prescribed by the doctor, or if she had eaten right. Sometimes this pressure made her nervous, and triggered certain crises that made her feel vulnerable, weak and incapable, and Shawn, in his immense love for her, didn't realize that he was making the situation even worse.

It had come to a head two nights earlier when he had come home from rehearsal and asked the hotel to prepare Rosaly a special dinner with everything she needed to eat. When the food arrived, Rosaly felt very nauseous and had not even put a spoonful in her mouth. Shawn had nagged her several times until he got angry and lectured her that she didn't care about the baby or herself, and if she kept this up he would have to hire a nutritionist to take care of her twenty-four hours a day.

Rosaly had felt so bad about the nausea and the harsh way he had spoken to her that she had simply fallen into a crying fit that she could not control.
When he saw her crying, Shawn ran to her, and hugged her, saying:

- Rosely, forgive me for being an asshole. I shouldn't have talked to you like that.  The problem is that I care so much about you. All I want is for you to be well, and have a healthy pregnancy." He kissed her hair tenderly while she kept her head tucked into his shoulder.

- I'm sorry. I'm trying, I swear, and I feel so awful and so useless. - she sobbed, and Shawn kept talking, trying to get Rosaly to calm down because being so nervous would only make her state worse.

-That's Ok. You don't have to feel this way. I promise I'll try to help you any way I can. Forget what I just said. I love you, just remember that. - he kissed her with all the love in the world, took her to bed, and lay down with her in his arms. Later, when she was calmer, Shawn brought her dinner in bed, and Rosaly slowly managed to eat some of the meal he served her.

After that, Shawn had become more pliable, finally realizing that his rigidity was only making her emotional state worse, and would consequently end up making her physical medical condition worse. However, he continued to watch her carefully, sending her messages every hour, but without too rigid a charge. He was trying to give her space without suffocating her with his care.

Rosaly understood that it was all new to both of them, and that they were each reacting and dealing with the situation in their own way, and that no one could blame them for not trying their best. They were first time parents and it was to be expected that they would make mistakes, no matter how hard they tried to get it right.

Rosaly brought her hands to her belly, where she could already feel a slight ripple, and began to caress it lovingly, thinking about how much this baby had changed her life. She felt filled with a fullness of love, so different from anything she had ever experienced, and it reached out and blended with her feelings for Shawn, uniting them even more and making them stronger for what was to come next.