Life as A Winchester Sister: Season 1

The talk

    I sighed. "Okay, fine, I did agree, so whatever," I complied, leaning back in my seat. Dean continued to drive down the road. "Where should we start?" I asked.

    "I really just want to know why you don't want to find dad," Dean asked, "And what "things" and "tough times" you were talking about the last few weeks?" He questioned, looking at me in the mirror again. 

    Tears came to my eyes once again, I couldn't help it.  

    "Cheyenne, whatever it is, you can tell us," Sam assured, turning around in his seat. I shook my head.

    "No, no, "I stuttered. "You don't get it, it's not just something I can say easily." A few tears made their way down my cheeks. 

    Dean decided to pull the car over. He wanted to be able to listen to me and not get into a car wreck. "Sweetheart," He empathized, "Why is it that you can't tell us?"

   "Dad... dad told me not to," I admitted, looking down at my hands. I couldn't bear to look either brother in the eyes. They stayed silent, waiting for me to continue.

     I took a breath before speaking again. "The reason I don't want to find dad i..is," I slowly spoke. "Is because I'm scared." I said, so quietly I'm shocked the boys heard me.

    "Scared of what, Cheyenne?" Sam asked. 

   Dean sat in silence for a moment. "Scared of dad?" he concluded. I nodded. "Why are you scared of dad?"

   I was getting more and more anxious. My breathing was picking up as well. I promised dad I wouldn't tell and I didn't know what to do.  

     "I need some air," I finally spoke up. I threw my door open and stepped out. I heard two more doors, meaning the boys had followed me.

     I walked a few feet away and ran my hands through my hair. Dean and Sam walked up to me. 

     "Cheyenne, this clearly is making you nervous," Dean remarked, grabbing my hands. "Please tell us, we just want you to be okay."

    "Dean's right," Sam agreed, rubbing my back. "Why are you scared of dad?" The same question came up.

    "He... He... hits me," I admitted, barely above whisper. But the boys heard.

    "Dad hits you?" Sam questioned, becoming concerned. 

    I shook my head and pulled away from my brothers. "I...I can... can't do this," I breathed out, feeling a panic attack coming on. My hands flew to my chest as I tried to catch my breath. "D...Dad is go...gonna kill... me." 

    Dean ran over to me and helped me sit on the ground. "Hey, Cheyenne, sweetheart, you need to calm down please," He begged, pulling me on his lap and placing my hand over his chest. Sam sat down next to us.

    "Cheyenne, breath, Dad isn't here, okay, he can't get to you right now," Sam ran his hand through my hair as he spoke. After a few minutes, I controlled my breathing. 

    "Now," Dean asked, "If you're ready, please explain about dad hitting you." he begged. "When did this happen" He asked, knowing that I wouldn't know when to start. 

     "A few different times," I began to explain, "It was always when he was drunk or really mad." I took a small pause. 

     "Why would he hit you, what led up to it?" Sam asked next.

     "It was after a hunt typically, you and dean were out somewhere, and dad had no one else to yell at," I told him. "Even when I didn't go on a hunt, he would find some way to blame me, and then I would argue, telling him it wasn't my fault, but he.." I took a breath and more tears fell down my cheek.

    Dean wiped them off. "It's okay, you can tell us."

     "He would slap me, or knock me to the ground," I explained, "And call me lazy and useless, that I wasn't a good daughter." I cried out. Sam held my hand. "And then he would kick me a few times, and afterwards he would leave to go drinking."

    "We never saw any marking or bruises," Dean commented. I could tell he was feeling guilty. 

   "Dad made sure I covered everything up, and he said if I told you guys he would do much worse." I sobbed into deans chest. He wrapped his arms around me. 

     "When was the last time?" Sam asked. Instead of talking, I took my hands and rolled up my sleeve, revealing a bruise that was healing,  but still noticeable. 

    "Oh my god, Cheyenne," Dean said, carefully taking hold of my arm to get a better look. Sam winced when he saw it. 

    "That was a few days before dad left on his hunt that he disappeared from," I explained, as Sam and Dean looked over my arm. "We got into an argument about me going with him, because I didn't want to stay by myself, but he didn't think I was good enough." 

    I glanced at Dean. "The next day I called you, to ask if I could come with you." 

    "I can't believe I didn't realize" Dean began to say. I stopped him

    "Dean this is not your fault, or Sam's," I tried to convince them. "It's mine for making dad angry."  I looked down at my bruise. 

    "No," Dean stated, pulling my chin to look at him. "This is not your fault, there are other ways to get anger out, and beating on your daughter is not one." he continued.

    I took a breath. "If that's all you wanted to know, can we continue driving now?" I pleaded. The boys looked at each other.

    "Of course, but," Dean agreed. I stood up, with the help of Sam, and made my way to the impala. "Cheyenne, when we find dad, we have to talk..."

    I whipped back around. "No," I stated. "Dad can't know that I told you guys." I begged.

    "Okay," Dean agreed again. "We won't let him know, but you aren't allowed to be alone with him, without one of us." 

     "No argument here," I replied. "Now, can we please get going?"

    "Yep, come on," The boys threw their arms around me and we walked to the car together. I felt much better with that secret out in the weapon, but it made me more worried for when dad did return.