Long Way Home

Chapter 32

December 2012 -past-

After just two years together, Spencer was starting to see herself spending the rest of her life with Luke. Even if he was her first boyfriend, and he was all she knew. It felt a little crazy at times, but she didn't really understand that the two of them barely had a relationship.

To spend time alone together, they often snuck off while they were at school since neither of them had completely learned to drive yet. So any chance she got to tell a little white lie to her parents and say she was going to Natalia's, she took it and got a ride to her boyfriend's house. Time alone at Luke's house was really the only time they could do anything they wanted, but the two always stopped before it went too far. Luke respected the blonde's wishes that she wasn't ready, though at times he felt like after two years she should be.

Luke was in the process of practicing driving, so he drove his mom and himself to Spencer's to pick her up. To say he was nervous was an understatement. As he pulled into the driveway, the girl was already walking out and climbing into the backseat, and Luke moved back as well so his mom could drive.

"Hi, Mrs. Hemmings, thank you so much for coming to pick me up." The blonde smiled softly at the woman in the front seat as she buckled up.

"Hi, Spencer." she smiled back, pulling out of the driveway once the three of them were all buckled in.

Luke quickly leaned over and kissed Spencer's cheek when he saw his mom wasn't looking, grinning to himself as he watched the heat rise in the girl's face. "How was church today?" he paused, making a little face. "Did it totally suck?"

"Luke Hemmings." His mom scolded from the front seat, sending him daggers through the rear view mirror.

"It's okay Mrs. Hemmings." Spencer laughed, shaking her head. "It kind of did totally suck. Today was really boring and it's pretty much exactly the same every week." It was quiet besides the radio for most of the drive, but as they pulled into the driveway, Luke's mother stayed put.

"I'm going to run to the store, did you need anything, honey?" She asked, turning to look at her son in the back seat.

"No, I'm okay." He climbed from the car, smiling at Spencer when she followed suit after him and closed the door. Walking inside together, both of Luke's older brothers were in the living room playing video games together. One of the two paused the game before they both turned to look at the couple that walked in the door.

"Oh, hey Spencer." Jack smiled, turning back to the game, and waiting impatiently for Ben.

The other brother looked the blonde up and down before looking at his younger brother, then back to the girl. "Hey, heading downstairs?"

"Actually my room first, then probably downstairs." Luke nodded, gently pulling the girl towards the stairs to escape his brothers as Ben called over his shoulder at the younger kids.

"Don't do anything stupid, Luke!"

Both Luke and Spencer felt their cheeks go pink, but neither commented on what he had said. Instead Luke closed his bedroom door and smiled weakly at his girlfriend as she took a seat on his bed, grabbing a small penguin stuffed animal and moving it to her lap.

"Didn't you have some sort of band meeting earlier? How'd that go?" The girl asked quietly, glancing around the room. It was an absolute mess, things thrown everywhere, piles of clothes, random items throughout.

"Uh yeah, it was good. It went good." He nodded, glancing at the ground before looking back at her. He loved talking about the band, but his mind was elsewhere and it was obvious. "We talked about a lot, made some big decisions as a band."

"That's good." Spencer smiled brightly, looking up at him with slightly wide eyes. She knew the band would do great things, she couldn't wait to see where things went for them. "Anything I get to know about yet, or do I have to wait?"

"You have to wait." He chuckled, shaking his head. "But really big things are gonna happen soon, and we're all really really excited."

Spencer's face lit up even more, the excitement bubbling up inside of her. "That's amazing, Lu!" But when he didn't share the same enthusiastic energy, her smile fell and her brows furrowed. "What's wrong?"

When their eyes met, he quickly looked to the ground again, sighing quietly. "I just need to talk to you about something important. That's why I brought you up here."

"Okay... what's up?" She whispered, placing the penguin back to the side as she made her way over to him.

"You're gonna hate me– please don't hate me, Jelly Bean." Luke whispered, grabbing her hands and pulling her right back to the bed where he sat and pulled the girl to stand between his legs. "Please just– I love you okay?"

"What's going on?" Spencer mumbled, searching his face but only finding signs of sadness and worry. So much different than the usual sunshine and happiness radiating from her boyfriend. "Are you–" she paused, taking a deep breath. "You're breaking up with me, aren't you? This is how people always act in movies and stuff."

Luke closed his eyes, sighing deeply before lifting his head to look at the girl again, his heart aching to just kiss her one last time. "I'm sorry."

"But why?" Spencer felt her eyes start to sting with tears, and as soon as the boy in front of her noticed, he was quick to stand up and pull her into a hug. "What did I do wrong?"

"Nothing! You did nothing wrong, Jelly Bean." He shook his head, holding the blonde to his chest. "This is all on me, I'm not ready for a serious relationship and I just don't want to lead you on."

The tall boy would never fully understand why he lied about it, why he couldn't just tell her the truth about the opportunity the band was getting and that he was leaving. He convinced himself he just didn't know how to tell her.

"Oh– okay." Spencer sniffled, keeping her face hidden against his chest, tears wetting a small patch on his shirt. "Yeah, I get it." she didn't. She felt like she had never been so confused. The two of them were happy and having fun. They loved each other.

"Spencer." He frowned. "Please look at me."

She slowly looked up to meet his eyes, wiping her tears as they continued to fall. She'd never been broken up with before, she wasn't sure how to ask what she wanted. So she just went for it. She wanted answers. "I don't understand why you don't want to be with me. You seemed ready for the relationship this whole time and now all of a sudden you're not?"

"I just– I have a lot on my mind right now and I don't want to ignore you or our relationship at all, Spence." He frowned, wiping the tears from under her eyes with his thumbs gently. "I promise, if you still want to be my girlfriend when the time is right, then I'll be with you in an instant."

"Mhm." She hummed, and stepped back as she looked at the ground. She wasn't sure she believed that the time would ever be right. "Okay."

"You hate me, don't you?"

"No, I could never hate you Luke." She whispered, shaking her head. She was determined to still be friends, she wouldn't let him breaking up with her ruin her friendship with him or the other boys. "Can I still stay and watch movies with you? My parents don't expect me to be home until curfew."

"I was really hoping you'd want to stay." Luke smiled, moving the blonde's chin to look up at him. "Come on, let's go to the basement and we can watch whatever movies you want."

"Can we make some popcorn too?" She whispered, unable to help the small smile that tugged at her lips, staring up at him. He chuckled and nodded before he started to pull her back downstairs. Right past his brothers so they didn't have the chance to accidentally tell Spencer that he'd be leaving soon. That every reason he gave her for breaking up was a lie.

The rest of the day was spent watching movies together, resisting the urge to cuddle up to each other or stare at the other too much. It was weird, but nice. They were both very confident they could be friends and that it would never change. That they'd always have each other.