Desires over pain

chapter ten

I was shocked and frightened, i didn't want to believe him, i couldn't believe that the person i was with for years as been the one trying to kill me " bu..but you broke up with me"
" i did, only because your father was in the house that night. He knew how much i knew and he was afraid that i was going to tell you so he came to me and told me that he was going to kill you and that if he can shoot you, he can also kill you and i was scared as hell, i didn't want to loose you so i had to give up loving you for you to be safe" and that night was your birthday, i had planned a suprise for you, i wanted you to celebrate your birthday with me but your so called father destroy everything. "
I cried more and more, i couldn't believe myself. " then did my father also threathen you to kill me "
" hell no, he did try to kill you but Fiona was with you so i didn't come over but i asked Fiona to send me pictures of you everyday, i told her to protect you from your father. Your father plan was for two of us to break up, so he did something he knows that you would forgive me for and it was if i killed your parents. "
" and he was right, you had an accident because you were not watching the road, that was the night Fiona was to introduce herself to you but you had an accident." He said.
I shaked my head negatively as i said " i didn't have an accident, you tried to kill me "
" and why would i try to kill you "
" i heard those men, they thought i was dead and they said to each other that you sent them to kill me "
" i didn't send anybody, cant you understand, they knew that you weren't dead, they didn't come to check if you were breathing or not, they stood close to you and started talking about me killing, cant you see that all this was planned"
" no, no dad will never hurt me "
" you are still in denial, i expected you to hug and kiss me, i gave up a lot of things for you to be safe, i did alot of things to make sure you didn't suffer, i sent Fiona to be with you, i bought williams restaurant so you could have where you will work and did you notice the special treatment you were given, it was all me" i looked stunned so everything was him, it was him, he loved me but i just couldn't believe that all this, it felt like a movie to me. I remembered my child and i guessed it was the perfect time to tell Raphael
" i still blame you for everything, that night when i came to you, i was meant to go to the hospital "
" yes i know and your father knew that you were going to look for me, so he came to me earlier"
" no, that is not what i wanted to say, i promised myself that i wasn't going to tell anyone but i have to, you deserve to know. That night when i came to you, i wanted to let you know that_ " i couldn't bring myself to say it.
"shhh, tell me what did you want to tell me "
" th....that.... I...was.....preg.....nant with your child " he looked shocked, i saw tears in his eyes and i was sobbing uncontrollably. He stood up and moved backwards, i stood up too as i cried. His mouth opened and closed but he didn't say anything. I saw tears rolling down his eyes and the next minute he was angry. He shouted as he started breaking things. I shouted for him to stop but i wasn't sure he heard me. After breaking everything breakable, he sat on the floor far from where the broken glass were as he sobbed. I walked to him and he hugged me and whispered " i am so sorry, i didn't know, i promise you, i didn't know. Please forgive me "
He said and one part of me couldn't help but think about everything he said tonight. We stayed like that for hours and i was the only one sobbing and he was patting my back.

He said "i promise you, i am going to kill him for this and i dont care if i loose my life "
"shhh, i am not sure if i can live without you"
" i love you so much, Elaura, i never stopped and i never will" i believed him, i believed everything he said and i was happy that i finally found out the truth, this was why everybody was saying that things are not how they seem to be, so they knew about everything and i was in the middle of everything and i was glad that Raphael hid it from me because i wasn't sure how the younger me was going to take it. " i..."
" you dont have to tell me, it's evident " he said and i punched him. He smiled as if he remembered something and said something quietly and the next minute he was grinning at me. He carried me bridal style to the bed, then he got a broom to sweep everything.
He brought dinner upstairs because i was lazy to go downstairs and we ate together. He washed the dishes and he filled the tub for me. I stayed inside trying not to think about everything he said tonight. He came in as he pecked my forehead and said " are you okay, you've been in here for too long "
" i lost track of time "
He helped me out . We showered together and we went to bed together.
"i love you too Raphael, i had always loved you, i never stopped and i never will "i said and he laughed as he kissed my head.
"what do you say to a new begining"
" sure "
" good night, L'amour de ma vie"(love of my life)
"meaning "
"love of my life "
"you lied to me "
"i didn't want you to punch me "
" good night, cara mia" (my darling) i said as i kissed him back and i went to sleep.