A Bottle of The Jack - Tommy Tate

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The gunshot echoed around the block. The world was put on pause after that moment. No one moved. The bullet still floating in the air. A silence filled the emptiness as the time seemed to stop. That was until Dwayne's body crashed to the ground. Gasps and screams seemed to follow as I watched you stand there with a smoking gun in your hand. You didn't look fazed. Part of you looked proud of what you did. I felt my heart crumble when you turned to look at me. My feet frozen to the ground in shock, I couldn't even move to check that Dwayne was okay. You promised me you would stay calm. You promised me that nothing would happen. He was one of your day ones, you would never even think about hurting him. That was a lie, and I knew it wouldn't be your last.

"Tommy, how could you?" I finally spoke. My words not having the aggression I intended. "You promised..."

"We need to go." Your voice was stern but I refused to go with you. "I'm going, with or without you." You snarled at me. You remained hot headed, clearly shooting your boy wasn't enough to remove that rage. I shook my head as you slid into your R8 and sped past the boy you left on the floor.

The next few moments passed in a blur. Everyone rushing around, checking on Dwayne as I continued my gaze towards the gate you left through. I couldn't believe that you would just disappear, leaving me to deal with your mess. Your mind seemed to continue to play stupid games and trick you into believing you'd done the right thing. Dwayne was rushed to hospital, operated on and taken to ICU so they could monitor his condition. You never even showed up, no one had seen you since you fired that gun. No one was surprised, but I was. This wasn't the boy I cared for, this wasn't the person I met.

"Can you drop me off at the bar? I need some thinking space." I asked Vince as the boys all returned to the block. I hadn't moved much since they left, I guess I was still in shock. I felt everyone's eyes burn through my skin, I don't know what I said but clearly it didn't go down well.

"Err, sure? Are you sure you want to be drinking?" Vince replied softly as he walked with me to his car. I shrugged, not knowing what else to say. All I wanted was to forget today. "I'm guessing you won't want company?"

"I think I just need a bottle of Jack, something to quieten the thoughts." I sighed. I didn't want to admit what had been going through my mind. I was far too worried about you to even consider what was happening with Dwayne. My heart was crushed that you never came back, you just abandoned everyone.

Vince drove me in silence, he pulled up outside the bar. It seemed quiet, but what more would you expect on a Tuesday evening? That wasn't ever prime time for drinking, but it felt perfect for me. I smiled softly at Vince, mouthing thank you as I stepped out his car. I walked towards the entrance, exhaling a breath I didn't realise I'd been holding. I pushed the door open to the dimly lit room and made my way to the bar. I didn't lift my eyes from the floor, carefully stepping through the chairs that were laid around.

"Whisky, no ice." I grumbled as I leant onto the counter top. I raised my gaze to the bartender and managed to throw a smile their way. They nodded before turning their back to me. I sighed heavily as the small tumbler was placed before me. "Can I run a tab, I might be here a while?"

"Of course, I'll get one started." They smiled softly. Was it that obvious to everyone I was in need of comfort?

I sat on the stool next to the counter and slowly sipped the whiskey. I was hoping the burn would take my thoughts away from you. I felt my phone vibrate repeatedly as I finished my drink. The bartender nodded before filling the empty glass up. Would it be you ringing me? Would it be one of the boys? Or was it going to be someone completely different to take my mind away? I didn't look. I couldn't bare to see your name. I continued to drink, more and more whiskey filling the cup.

"You're Tommy's girl, right?" The bartender asked politely, clearly trying to make small talk. That or he was wanting to find out information whilst I was slightly intoxicated. "You could say that, or you could pour my drink like a good boy." I slurred as the door crashed open. His body turned stiff and the sound of stumbling feet fell through the room.

"You didn't answer my calls." Your voice filled the room. I refused to look at you. I lifted my glass and let the whiskey burn my throat. "I fucking needed you." You scowled and you gripped my shoulder, turning me to face you. Your hair was a mess, scrunched out of place and knotted at the ends. You looked dishevelled, that wasn't the Tommy I knew. Your face was cut, dried blood laid on your cheek. Your knuckles were red, yet another sign that you'd been a fool. "Look at me!" Your voice remained as toxic as the liquid in my cup.

"Another whiskey please dear, Jack if you've got it." I glanced at the bartender, who at this point looked terrified. His hands shaking and he fumbled looking for the bottle. "Or whatever you have, just fill it up. Tommy will cover it, won't you?" I finally set my eyes on yours. You looked broken, yet you continue to act strong. You nodded, eyes not moving from mine. You were trying to read my mind, but you knew that this was the last chance you had. "Are you done with the attitude? You're scaring the poor lad, he doesn't need to deal with your shit, neither do I."

"He should know better than to stand too close to you." You spat, your piercing eyes now switched to the boy behind the bar. "You don't fucking own me Tommy. Shut the fuck up, sit the fuck down or I'm gone." I spat back with more venom, slamming my glass on the side. "I'm sorry, he's a bit... well, you know how leaders get."

"Are... are you okay?" The bartender asked me as you slumped away into a booth in the back corner of the empty bar. He was terrified of you, of your reputation. You really did have the capabilities of making the whole world stop at your feet. "Is there anything..."

"Keep the bottles coming, don't contact anyone. He wasn't here. Is that clear?" I spoke with a deadpan voice, something I had learnt from you in recent months. You were normally so good at keeping your emotions under wraps; I don't know why that changed today. "Oh, you also heard nothing. No one laid a finger on me, understood." He nodded, panic dancing across his face and eyes. He passed a bottle of whiskey and another glass. I carried everything over to the seat you chose and waited for the tension and silence to finally break.

"You know I care for you, don't you?" You mumbled as I watched the thoughts cross your mind. That wasn't the first sentence you thought of, we both know that. I can tell when you're lying, especially to me. "Today, it was messy."

"Messy! Are you kidding me T, it was a fucking shitshow at best!" I snapped, maybe the alcohol had finally sunk in. Or maybe I stopped caring about your image. "I never thought you would do something as stupid as that. You didn't even think. You just. Well, you know what you did. You lied Tommy, you looked me in the eyes and lied."

"You really think I wanted that to happen, you think I'm happy about it!" Our voices growing louder with every word spoken. My eyes burning with rage. "You looked fucking happy, when you drove away!" I screamed, all emotions spilling out of my mouth. "You're fucking poison."

"I'M POISON! YOU'RE THE MOST VICIOUS BITCH I KNOW!" Your eyes slam shut as the words echo around the room. I can tell that in this moment you want to disappear. You regret saying it, but you still said it. Every. Single. Word.

I look at the half filled glass on the table. I hold it in my hand, thinking of what comes next. I don't want to speak, I don't want to scream, I don't want to look at your face. The anger is pulsing through my veins more aggressively than the alcohol to my brain. I see you shuffle close to me in my peripheral vision. I don't move away, I simply raise my hand, motioning you to stop. You did, which surprised me. I hold the glass to my lips, not to drink it, but to think. What was the next move? The tension is building and I felt two sets of eyes on me. One from you, practically begging me to speak, and the other from the bartender, patiently watching for a chance to intervene even though he knew he shouldn't.

I sip the rest of the drink, slowly, ensuring that your full attention remained on us. "Two options. You leave, or I do." I held the glass against my lips as I contemplate whether I should say anymore. "Listen, I didn't-" You began but I looked you in the eyes and hushed you.

"You or me, choose." My tone remained calm as every thought passing through my mind was chaotic and destructive. You stayed still, no indication you were even listening to me. I exhaled heavily, you were pushing me to be someone I wasn't. I didn't want to do this. You left me no choice. My hand raised to the sky, glass now empty as it hurtled through the air and smashed against the wall behind you.

"This is all your fault Tommy Tate, you did this."

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