Dissociation

Welcome home

« Thanks for the ride sir »
« No problem ma'm » replied the truck driver as Arya came out of it. She slowly started walking towards her old house while contemplating the yellowish leafs falling from the trees. She immediately put on her scarf around her as the wind blowed, it was cold, really cold and the village looked deserted. Where's everyone? She wondered. She finally reached her mom's house and as she was about to enter, she heard barking, she turned her head to see where the noise was coming from and saw a dog running towards her. She quickly opened the door and entered the house, few minutes after that, a man came to take the dog away and only then did she open the door to greet him.
« I'm sorry about that— Arya? Is that you ? » said the man. She stared at his dog for a few seconds then lifted up her gaze to him. He was muscular, had an average height and messy copper curls.
« Rick I suppose.. yeah it's me » replied Arya still a little bit shaken by what just happened.
« Wow, it's been a long time, what are you up to now? » he asked, still struggling to calm his dog.
« Not much, can we talk about it later? I'm really tired » she said.
« Yeah no problem » said Rick, making his way back to his house.
« So he's my neighbor now huh? » she asked herself watching him leave. She closed back the door and put her luggage next to the sofa. Walked around the house which was dusty due to years of neglect.
17 years had passed since Arya came here, after what happened to John, her mother decided it'll be better if they go away for some time to protect Arya's mental health. She proposed her mother came back with her but she refused, claiming that the village is now cursed and she won't put foot there.
« Okay Arya, what's the next step now? » she asked herself. Everything was just as they left, the pictures were still hanging on the walls, there was even still some expired stuff in the fridge. Looking at all this made Arya think they traveled in a rush, not even having time to take much.
« Damn, why were we so hurried? » she said. Arya didn't remember much of the night they traveled, all she remembers is waking up in the backseat of a car watching her mom drive and quickly fell back asleep. The past didn't matter now, what matters is the present and the futur she thought.
« Let's do some cleaning » she said, clapping her hands.

About 5 hours later, she was done.. the sun had already went to sleep and it was even colder than in the morning.
« Knock knock » someone said at the door. Arya went in front of the door and asked who it was.
« It's me, Rick... you said I could come over, remember » he said. Arya sighed, she was really exhausted from all the cleaning and didn't need to have a draining conversation right now but still opened the door with a smile on her face «  I can't chase him twice » she thought.
« Hey, come in » she said. Rick did as instructed and sat down on the sofa.
« So.. how are are you and what have you been up to? » he asked. Why does he care so much?! Arya wondered.
« I'm fine, like I said earlier, nothing much you know.. » she said, trying to release less information as possible.
« How's the city? What did you study there? » he asked furthermore.
« Do you want anything to drink ? » she asked, going into the kitchen.
« Just coffee please » he said. Few minutes later Arya came in with two cups of coffee and saw Rick looking at the pictures on the walls.
« Here it is » she said, putting them on the table.
« Looking at these makes me realize how much time has passed » he said. Arya didn't respond, she still wondered what he wanted, she wasn't really close to him when they were little so she didn't understand why he acted like they were long time friends who lost touch with each other.
« You didn't answer my question » he said, sitting back down.
« City is nice, you should go too » she said coldly.
« Will do, so what did you study? »
« Law » she said.
« Interesting.. what branch specifically? »
« The branch who makes me question if this is an interrogation or a welcoming visit » she responded, looking straight into his eyes while sipping some coffee.
« Whew, no..just starting a conversation here » he said awkwardly while rubbing the back of his head.
« I see.. so what have YOU been up to? » she asked.
« Nothing much, I never left this village and right now I own 2 stores.. one is kind of a grocery store and the second is butcher's shop, both are running averagely well » he said proudly. Arya chuckled at these words but didn't let him notice.
« Any wife? Kids? Or it's just you and your dog? » she asked, noticing no ring on his finger. Rick sipped some coffee before putting the cup on the table.
« No wife yet, I have a son but he's with his mom right now » he said briefly. Arya understood by the change of mood that he didn't want to go into details. They both sat in silence for some minutes when Rick asked;
« What about you? »
« huh? »
« Any husband or kids? »
« No husband, no kid » she said.
« Yet.. » he added
« Not planning to » she said firmly.
« Why » he asked. Arya ignored his question and continued drinking her coffee like he was not there, this made him feel not really welcomed anymore.
« Well, gotta go.. it was a pleasure catching up with you » he said, getting up and walking towards the door.
« Goodnight » she simply replied.

« Hey buddy » said Rick while scratching his dog's head, so many questions rushed in his mind after his little chat with Arya; why is she here after all these years? Why leave a beautiful life in the city to come back to this dead village? Her audacity !! He sighed and let his body fall freely on his bed. He closed his eyes for some seconds and suddenly woke up panicked, his heart beat was faster and the room felt like it was turning in circles. He struggled to reach his drawer, from where he took a tablet of medication and quickly put two of them in his mouth and swallowed, only then did his body began to relax.
« This hadn't happen to me in months ». He took his phone out of his pocket to check the time and realized hours had passed. He went down stairs to make a cup of coffee « I can't sleep, I should not sleep! » he said continuously like a maniac. Few minutes later, he wondered around the house still avoiding to fall asleep but stopped in front of the wall separating his room from his toilets, he then removed a brick from it and took out a box. He hesitated before opening it but eventually did, tears rolled down his eyes as he held the bloody knife he took out of the box.
« I don't know what to do buddy, I'm slowly losing my mind » he said, whimpering like a baby until he eventually fell asleep.