Hidden Miracles • Tyler Joseph •

🦒 ONE

          •  One Week Later  •

Tyler stared blankly out the window as the October wind scattered fallen leaves across the backyard. The Brightly colored reds and yellows reflected the exact opposite of what he was feeling inside. He had grown used to the rolling waves of nausea in his stomach and the dizziness that plagued him everyday since she died. He lifted the beer bottle to his lips and tilted his head back to allow the fizzy liquid to fill his body and mind once more. It was temporarily numbing his pain and he craved for peace.

The amount of bottles that littered the bedroom floor was sickening but no one had bothered to pick them up when they would check on him. He finished the bottle and tossed it to the floor before he flopped back onto the bed with a dramatic huff. He stared up at the ceiling and blinked a few times as the edges of his vision began to blur slightly. He felt lost, exhausted and so hungry. He couldn't piece together the last time he had eaten anything besides saltine crackers and pretzels.

His eyes began to slip closed but someone interrupted his almost slumber by knocking on the door.

"Ty, come on! We gotta leave in an hour!" Josh called through the door. Tyler slowly opened his eyes, squinting in concentration. What were they leaving for? What day was it? When was the last time Selene did the laundry? Where was she?

The door gradually swung open and Tyler's eyes flicked upwards to Josh's upside down figure. He could make out the look of total disappointment on his best friend's face. He did not look pleased. His lips were set in a deep frown and his arms were crossed tightly across his chest.

"Hiiii Josh!" Tyler greeted a little too enthusiastically but maybe that was the alcohol shining through. A wide, goofy grin spread across his face before he clumsily flipped over onto his stomach to see Josh more clearly. He tucked his hands beneath his chin and then rested his chin on his hands. He stared up at his best friend, Josh still hadn't said a word since he had entered the room.

"You do remember what day it is right?"

Tyler fought his way through his clouded thoughts to at least attempt to give Josh a response. What day was it? His eyes squinted in deep concentration, his brows scrunched together in effort. But his mind was blank. Nothing came to him that was significant...

Josh's impatience must have ran out because the glare he was directing towards him was like ice.

"Today is Selene's funeral! And it starts in an hour and you aren't even ready! Tyler, you have to get yourself together!" His friend's tone was unlike him. Josh was the calm and level-headed one and Tyler was the one to panic and overthink.

"Oh." Tyler replied, his eyes slowly drifting down to the comforter on his bed.

"Your wife is dead and all you can say is oh?" He scoffed and threw his hands up. "Get up. Go take a shower." He added.

Tyler closed his eyes and sighed heavily. He could see that he shouldn't push Josh any further.

He pushed himself up onto his hands and knees. He had to get up and get himself to the bathroom.

He stumbled and swayed his way to the bathroom connected to his bedroom and closed the door behind him.

     •     🦒     •

Tyler exited the bathroom ten minutes later to find Josh had already laid his clothes on the bed as well as a glass of water along with pain killers on his bedside table. He was the best friend anyone could ask for, especially with how patient he was being with him.

He pulled the white button up on and the pair of black dress pants up. He fixed his clothes and trudged to his door, pulling it open.

The top floor of the house was quiet as his sock covered feet created a soft pitter-patter on the hardwood floor. The closer he got to the stairs, the shuffling of feet and his mother's soft voice bounced off the walls below.

Oh no...Tyler groaned internally as he finally registered that his darling mother was prowling around his house. Great.

He and his mother had always been close but now she was bound to become a helicopter parent even though he was turning thirty in a few months. A prickle of pain pierced his heart as he realized Selene wouldn't be there to celebrate his age milestone with him. Tyler chewed on his bottom lip and forced his way down the wooden stairs. He was preparing for anything she might say.

Five pairs of eyes pierced his soul as he shuffled into the kitchen. No one spoke and he liked it that way. He headed for the fridge and opened it, peering inside. Squinting at the unnatural glow of the light, he reached inside the nearly empty top shelf and plucked a can of Redbull out. He used his elbow to close the door as his free hand lifted the tab on the can

The room was deadly silent still and it was getting uncomfortable now. His eyes flickered over to the five individuals in his kitchen, all wearing a form of black clothing for the funeral. After a long drawn-out drink from his can, he lowered it and set it on the counter.

"I thought funerals were meant to be silent, not the time before." He remarked, his level gaze moving from one face to the next.

Kelly, his mother, shifted her stance, not needing his gaze. "We...just don't want to put any unnecessary stress on you."

He refrained from rolling his eyes and instead he raised a brow at her. "Thanks, I guess? I'm fine."

His words weren't convincing to himself so why did he think they would be for them? John, Selene's father, was next to speak.

"Selene wouldn't want to see you like this." His words flared up his anger all at once. He shot an icy glare inJohn's direction, his mouth set in a hard line. "How would you know how Selene feels? I think my feelings are valid considering I just lost my wife!" He sneered, his fists balling up at his sides. His outburst surprised the small group, his mom had taken a timid step backwards and John had reacted as if he had struck him.

When no one had responded, Tyler grunted in annoyance and headed to the coffee pot. He poured a cup for himself, adding heaps of cream and sugar. He would kneed all the caffeine he could get to survive through the day. "You haven't asked about Adelaide." His mother said in a quiet tone. "I don't want to see her right now." He responded, continuing to face away from them as he gingerly sipped at his steaming beverage. He maneuvered over to the kitchen island and set his coffee cup down. He sighed heavily, leaning his weight on the island. "I'll go get the baby ready to go." His mother announced quietly as she disappeared up the stairs.

"Do you need anything Ty?" Josh asked, standing across from him. Tyler shook his head but didn't speak. The group was silent the rest of the time until Kelly plodded downstairs with a pink car seat. Tyler didn't even glance up to acknowledge his daughter.

He gingerly sipped his coffee, avoiding everyone's gazes. "Okay, let's get this over with." He mumbled, draining the last few gulps and put the mug in the sink. Shuffling footsteps and quiet murmurs were the only sounds filling the air as the group filed out of Tyler's house. Tyler got into Josh's car and laid his head on the window. He frowned deeply as his eyes fluttered closed. Glimpses of Selene's dark, wavy curls and the way her blue eyes lit up with every corny joke he would tell her flashed behind his eyelids. His heart clenched at the memories and a single tear slid down his cheek.

God, how would he survive this?