A Beauty in Distress (Romance)

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Review date: January 10, 2023

Author: sweetaspoisonHCfanaa

FIRST IMPRESSION: 4/5

COVER: 3/5

TITLE: 5/5

Firstly, the title reminded me of a "damsel in distress," an archetype of a woman in a fairy tale (especially a princess) waiting to be rescued by a prince. I've read about this a lot, but my impression of the title "Beauty in Distress" is quite good. Even if there doesn't seem to be a hundred percent originality, the replacement of the words "beauty" and "damsel" is intriguing and has a nice ring to it. As always, I don't pressurize the author to change the title since it must only be taken as an impression. But with that being said, I really like the title.

The cover was just right. However, I wasn't really a big fan of all the subjects in the frame. They're too many, and I prefer reducing the number of subjects so it doesn't look like a collage randomly put together. There was too much going on to the extent that I don't know where exactly to focus. I also won't suggest capitalizing the letters of the username if some of the letters or numbers are not meant to be capitalized.

BLURB: 6/10

The poem firstly wasn't really a standout since it didn't sound well to me. I read it and it was, quite frankly, clear enough to decipher. However, the construction of the poem sounded odd, especially with the repetition of rhymes. It may have been referenced from a source named "Savage Boy," but somehow, I don't recommend including it unless a better poem could take its place.

Moving on to the rest of the blurb, I was able to understand the intention–how these two characters have opposing lives (one being described as a struggling, innocent angel and the other, as a naughty devil). There's not so much of "showing" in the blurb, but rather "telling." Instead of telling the reader he fell in love with her, show what he realized and how he fell in love with her. Though, I'd also need to point out that these adjectives are redundant since the qualities of angels and devils are already given by nature.

PLOT: 19/20

CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT: 17/20

WRITING STYLE: 7/10

DESCRIPTIONS: 9/10

To start with, bold and italicized letters for dialogues must never be used. The depiction of violence was already sending me to the edge of my seat since it was already there in the beginning. But don't get me wrong, while I was reading, I was visualizing another opening. I didn't mind that the book would contain sensitive content such as violence, r*pe, and bloody scenes, but the writing wasn't really expressed in conviction. If the depiction of violence, r*pe, and blood scenes were that serious and death-defying, they have to be written with more certainty and emotion, in my opinion.

I thought the dialogue could also be fixed or improvised since it seemed kind of shallow and childish ("I will kill you"/"I will kill her"/"She is mine"/"Either she's mine or I will kill her").But in the next parts, I was already impressed with how the author was finally "showing" and not "telling." It tended to fluctuate, though. And that shouldn't be happening.

The plot though was okay. Although it was initially perceived from the point of view of the author, I was able to get a hold of the characters and where they stand, such as Shinzhi who is labeled as a "dramatic bitch." I understood that. If there's no other way to call her, I don't have a problem calling the character a "dramatic bitch" if that's who she really is.

But as I was reading the descriptions that were obviously thought through, I was bothered by how frequently the author puts random notes in between paragraphs. They may be needed, but they have to be appropriately executed in the story. It didn't enlighten me, but rather confused me. Even the "hahaha" was off. Something else could serve as a substitute.

"To be continued..." placed at the end of the chapter really doesn't need to be written since this is an ongoing story and it is understood that readers will have to wait for the next chapters.

GRAMMAR/PUNCTUATION: 7/10

For the last rubric, I studied grammar and punctuation. Now, I took note of the heavy punctuation issues, how ":-" is used with emojis when in fact you only put quotation marks from the beginning to the end, closing the statement. It would be way better if the expressions, again, would be shown instead of simply adding an emoji out of nowhere.

OVERALL: 77/100

I found the entire story catchy and the creativity is evident, but some moderate improvements and adjustments are worth noting.

Thank you for trusting me in reviewing your book! <3, Isabelle

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