Unsatisfied.

Part Four.

Anger consumed me as I kept my eyes on the road, thinkin of how I'ma figure out who did this shit and how this shit even happened. I couldn't believe I got that phone call, it never seem real when its one of yours. I then lost family and friends to this street shit growing up and even now in this day and age, but thinkin about how I could possibly lose my pops though? Shit had me feeling uneasy I can't front. Without my pops nothing just made sense. I couldn't lose em. If Amina wasn't in this car I would shed a few but I couldn't cry in front of her. I always felt like I had to put up this tough facade around her, and her with me too but I feel like we both see through each other. Amia always been different from other chicks since we was kids which is why I was always so fucked up behind her gettin involved with Marcus, I wanted her myself. Then him getting her put in jail and convincin' her to do that time for him... I wanted to murk that nigga especially after what he did to her while she was in there. We had a thing going on back in the day we just never acted on it. When Marcus used to put his hands on her she would run to my house because she knew he wouldn't come there looking for her. I would hide her from him for weeks, months sometimes. But I can't lie having her in the car wit me make shit a lil better. "I'm sorry about your pops" she said breakin the silence. I bit down on my lip and then I let out a low sigh. "My mind everywhere" I said. "Already gotta deal with this club shit and these niggas comin after us, now this..." I trailed off as I shook my head. "It's just too much man.. I was just living life  yesterday before all this shit happened. no care in the world. Had good conversation with my pop, he telling me he proud of me and shit but he didn't tell me anybody was after em. So I know it had to be some random muhfuckas who did it. It just don't make sense how shit change in such little time. Feel like the weight of the world on my shoulders" I said. "I know how you feel.." she said in a low voice. "Having the weight of the world on your shoulders is the worst feeling. Feel like you backed all the way up against the wall with no way out" she said and I glanced at her and she stared out the window. "That shit always fucked me up you know" I said to her as I glanced at her again then back at the road. "What" she asked. "You doin all that time." I added. "6 years though Mia. I never got to ask you what was you thinkin. I mean I know you wasn't gone snitch and I know you a down ass woman, but damn" I trailed off and she stayed quiet for a minute and then spoke up. "I thought he loved me. And I really did love him so I just felt like he would never do me like that and you would think people wouldn't do you like that but they will.. and they'll move on like it's nothing and that's the worst pain ever" she said. "The first year I always thought about how I would be in my 20's. I don't know if you remember but I used to always say at age 24 I wanted my first kid, I love kids. I used to wanna do so much with my life, I had dreams and I had all of that snatched from me. Sometimes I wondered if it was my toughness that got me in some of the situations I landed in. Now it's gonna be hard for me to even get a job, for me to start that business I always had in mind, because of my record. I just hate him." She said and I listened to her rant and I felt for her. I glanced at her and cleared my throat and sat up a little. "You can still do all that" I said. "He didn't stop shit I promise" I added. "How Coop" she asked. "Get you a real nigga who willing to invest in you. With that you can't go wrong" I said and she laughed. "I'm definitely not looking for love coop" she said and I side eyed her and laughed a little because little did she know I was all she need. I'm a turnt nigga I'm not gone lie I live a wild lifestyle but If she let me I a be willing to calm down for her. She said she not looking for love so I'm not gone push up on her too much but I want her. Even though we was having good convo I couldn't shake my pops I was just ready to make it to him and make sure he alright and figure out who the fuck did this shit. I pulled up in front of her house and she looked at me. "Keep me updated on your dad alright" she said. "I got you" I said and she smirked. "Be safe" she said. "You know I will" I said. She reached for the door handle and was about to get out and I stared at her. "You able to leave" I asked. "Leave where" she asked. "Leave and come with me. We a be back we just gone be gone for a couple days" I said. "Yeah I'm able to go" she said with a smile. "Alright coo. I gotta book these flights it's one I found for 8:00PM and that's 2 hours from now but we might go a lil early at like 7 because it get packed quick" I said to her. "Okay I'm gonna go pack ill be back" she said and then she closed the door. My phone started to ring and I looked and seen that it was Ric. "Wassup man" I said as I answered the phone and put it to my ear. "Wassup bro you good" he asked. "Tryna be" I said. "Shit fucked me up" I added. "You know I know how that go. So I feel you" he said. "I'm here for whatever if you need anything call me I'm there" he said. "Fasho bro I appreciate that" I said. "Love" he said. "Love" I said back and then I hung up. She came back out and I got out and grabbed her bags for her. "Thanks" she said and I nodded and put her bags in the trunk and then got back in. We drove off and I had a couple stops to make before we headed out to catch our flight. "I gotta stop at my dude crib real quick if that's coo" I said and she nodded and I pulled into the parking lot of his apartment complex. "You comin in with me" I said as I kept my eyes on all the Niggas that was standing out front. I got out and walked over to her door and opened it for her. She got out and they all stared. "Wassup coop" C said as he sat on the stoop. "Wassup C be in there" I asked. "Yeah he up in there" he said back. "Ayo you the chick that did that time for that cruddy ass nigga right" one of the dudes yelled to Amina. She nodded and he nodded at her. "Respect ma" he said back and we turned to walk in. I put her in front of me as we walked up the stairs and I did a knock on the door only me and Lodi know. "Come in" he said and I walked in. "Nigga still keepin that door unlocked. I told you bout all them broke ass niggas that be in here they gone run through yo shit keep playin" I said as I walked over to him and dapped him up. "Man them Niggas not gone play crazy" he said. "Wassup wit you" he added. "Shit. I got a flight to catch her in a minute. Some shit goin on with my pops" I said. "Word well I ain't gone keep you too long. I got that shit over to the crib already I just wanted to get this money to you" he said. "Who this" he asked noddin to Amina as she stood next to me. "Amina this Lodi, Lodi this Amina" I said as I introduced him. "Aw okay okay so this her. heard a lot about you" he said. She stayed quiet and I wanted to let out a laugh. She was so tough, it was her whole demeanor that did something to me. I nodded for her to sit down and we both did. He grabbed the bag and handed it to me and I unzipped it and started to count what was all in the bag. "Nigga it's all there you ain't gotta count it" he said. I fucked with Lodi, he was one of my Niggas from around the way I met throughout the years, I trusted him with my life but I don't trust too many Niggas with my paper, if you get it you get it. "Shit you know how I am" I said. "Yeah nigga I know. Wassup with ya pops though everything good" he asked me as I continued to count the money. "Man.." I trailed off as I shook my head. "I don't know what the fuck went down. All I know is he in ICU. Shit ain't looking too good" I said. "Man what" he said with expression. Everybody fucked with my pops, he was the streets, shit he is the streets. They was his even when he moved states, muhfuckas knew who this shit belonged to. He made me the place holder here when he left and I came into the game and maintained what he had goin on here but I did my own thing too just like he taught me. "That's fucked up. Shit you know you just gotta call me I'm there" he said and I nodded, tryin not to lose count. "Can I use your bathroom" she asked. "Yeah it's down the hall to the right" he said and she stood up and started to walk away and from the side of my eye I seen him staring at her which kind of pissed me off but I brushed it off, remembering that she not my girl, yet. "Yo wassup" he said in a quiet but loud tone. "What you mean" I asked as I reached the final count and zipped the bag back up. "That's yo girl or what, or I got dibs" he said. "Nigga you got a whole wife and kids" I said and he laughed. "Man Keena know I'm fuckin off" he said. I laughed and shook my head. I was a ladies man myself but vowed that if I ever found me one to settle down with and take that step to marry and have kids with, I was gone be loyal. "You wild. But nah she ain't like that though man and you know she just did all that time so she ain't really lookin for no shit like that" I said in her defense. "I get it I get it. You want dibs that's coo" he said. "Man na you know I'm out here wit it with the females. But she just really ain't one of them girls that we used to. Nigga fucked her head up I don't blame her" I said. "Speakin of that nigga. What's goin on with that situation" he said. "That shit gone get handled soon as I get back to the city." I said. "Let me handle that for you" he said. Lodi had his run in with that nigga Marcus too, years after that shit with Amina though. He went up to Ohio where Marcus was at to talk business and Marcus did some cruddy shit to him too. Ran off with some money, sticky finger muhfucka can't keep his hands off people shit but it was coo cause I got somethin for that. "She gone handle that" I said. "Oh yeah" he asked and I nodded. "Say less" he said. The bathroom door opened and I stood up. "You ready" I asked her and she nodded. "Ayo keep me updated on pops" he said. "I got you" I said as I dapped him up. "Alright then lil mama" he said to her. She waved and then we walked over to the door and walked out. We got in the car and I started it up and pulled off. "You hungry again you wanna get something to eat before we head to the airport" I asked. We had about a hour to spare and I was starvin. I was a skinny nigga but I could eat like a muhfucka. "Somethin quick" I asked. "That's fine" she said back and I nodded and pulled up to Ced's kitchen. "What's this" she asked. "Chicken joint" I said. "Good I was wondering when I was gone eat some" she said and I laughed and we got out. I watched as she walked around the car and I just couldn't even believe that this was Amina from when we was kids. Like she grew up real well and I was loving what I was seeing. I had to have her in due time.