melissas pov (focused on barbara though)

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it's around 9 am, and i wake up to the sound of pacing, amongst muffled worrying. it must be barbara. worried, i come to my senses , looking around the room. on the desk next to barbara's side, her cross necklace is lying haphazardly. she never takes it off, not even when she's asleep. what could possibly be going on?
i hop out of bed, and run out to the hallway, where i see barb. coming up to her , i hold her in place gently. "barbara! what is it hon?"
"oh,, melissa.. you were up so late, i figured you'd still be sleeping."
she smiles at me worriedly, like she's trying to reassure me but she can't quite do it the way she wants to.
"barbara , i don't know if it's my business but i woke up to you talking to yourself and your necklace you always wear is off. do you wanna talk about it?"
"i.. i don't know if i can". barbara stutters.
i grab barbara's hand softly and lead her to sit down at the kitchen table.
"barbara; if it's something i did last night, you can tell me. did i take it too far? were you not ready? we don't have to do anything more if you're not okay with it yet."
"no.. that's not it. you know how religious i am.. what if the church ladies find out? what if they don't accept me , and shun me? what if i really am commiting a sin? how can love be a sin?? how do i feel this good, this amazing, this beautiful young and euphoric with you if it's a sin? i just don't know , mel.. i .. i don't know."
barbara says.
"oh honey.. i don't even know what to say. i'm catholic and i understand your guilt. i promise it gets better eventually. everything will be okay in the end. we can even find a lgbtq accepting church to go to tomorrow, would you like that? i haven't gone to church in a while, but i'll go with you if that will make you feel better. we can find one online. or we don't have to. you can take a break. "
i hold her hand across the table. "it's okay to feel like this, barb. i get it. it might take a while to feel okay again, and that's okay. " i stroke barbara's face lovingly, and she stares into my emerald green eyes, while i stare back into hers, shining through tears, somehow, making her even more beautiful. barbara leans in and passionately kisses me longingly. i kiss back, holding her neck, my arms around her , my hair back.
i lean back from barbara a little , stroking her face gently again. "we'll figure it out ,  barb." "i promise."

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