angeline ✔️

13 - angeline

angeline

"so, he fucked his ex wife?" maddie asks with a scoff.

"yep," i sigh, leaning my head back against my backboard. "i feel like it shouldnt hurt, but i also know that im allowed to feel this way."

"angeline." she deadpans, adjusting so shes turned towards me. "you cannot put your feelings down. you are perfectly okay to feel the way youre feeling. you have the right to feel hurt. you broke up for all of your safety."

"i know." i begin. "but i cant help but feel like maybe i should just put matt aside. he fucked me up. really bad. and i felt like i was finally getting over it when i was with eddie."

she smiles sadly, rubbing my shoulder.

"i feel so shitty saying this, but sometimes i wish that matt would just kill me so i wouldnt have to deal with this shit. the grieving of my baby. the loss of a love. the betrayal."

"angie." i notice her eyes tear up. "i love you."

"i love you, too, mads." i smile.

she opens her arms and i situate on her chest. sister cuddles always hit the spot.

-

eddie

"hey, buddy. what'd you wish for?" i grin, picking up chris.

he had wanted to wait in line for santa by himself, so i sat at the exit. i made sure to get plenty of pictures.

"i cant tell you." he grins. "santa's working on it."

i hum and tickle his belly, making him giggle softly.

we walk around for a little bit before we go back home. its late, so i help christopher get into his pj's and into bed.

"is santa real?" he suddenly asks.

"what? did someone say that he wasnt?" i turn, pulling up his desk chair.

"when you were gone, i asked santa for you to come back. and you did." he says quietly, looking down at his hands.

i dont know what to say. i just grab onto his hand.

"you know, christmas wishes arent the same as birthday wishes. you can tell me what you wished for." i mention, leaning my head on my hand.

"i wished for angie."

oh.

i let out a deep sigh.

"me too." i smile sadly. "but santa will make it happen."

"he better." he grins.

"well, goodnight, bud." i stand, patting my legs.

"goodnight, dad." he mumbles. i lean down and kiss his head, fixing the cover.

i step over to the door and shut off the light, closing the door just a crack. 

-

angeline

i wrap the blanket around me tightly, adjusting the pillow behind me.

its the only way i can sleep now. 

the pillow reminds me of eddie and it helps soothe any panic that i may have.

i close my eyes, but i cant sleep.

i miss eddie.

i miss christopher.

god.

i miss my boys.

im too busy drowning in my sorrow to notice my closet door creak open.

i only realize when i start to hear footsteps walking towards me.

my heart begins to race and i frantically search for my phone. i hit someones number, but im not sure whos.

"p-please." i stutter, scooting up against the wall.

my lamp shined on his face and everything i feared would happen comes true.

its matt.

a/n:
ik this one is shorter, its about half of the usual chapters, but i wanted a bit of a cliffhanger :)