Wake Up

Chapter Three

-Ellies POV-
I was sitting on the couch in Adam's house. He had the band over and they were practicing a new song that they wrote for their new album. Ellie was off with some friends and Matt was at work. I worked an opening shift so I was off pretty early that day. It was almost two in the afternoon and I hadn't eaten anything. I wanted to eat lunch but I felt weird rummaging through another person's kitchen to find food. Adam came out of their rehearsal room and saw me chewing on my fingernails.

"How's practice?" I asked him.

He smiled. "It's going really well. I think you'll like the new song."

After he grabbed what he needed from the kitchen he started to walk away, but then he turned around. "You haven't eaten yet have you?"

I smiled at him. "No. But I'll be okay."

"GUYS. FOOD BREAK!"

I jumped at the sudden change in his volume.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you."

The guys came running out.

"We're getting food wherever Ellie wants since she hasn't eaten yet today."

After some discussion we settled on a ramen shop. I ended up getting spicy chicken. Lunch was quick but it was good. I tried to pay for my food but none of them would let me. We got back and Nora was sitting on the couch.

"Hey Nora!" I said. It had been a few days since my dad broke into my apartment and over those few days Nora had actually been really nice. I don't know if she was doing it because she wanted to or if it was out of pity, but either way I didn't care. I was just happy she was done with trying to scare me off.

"Hey Els."

"That's Ellie. Only Matt gets to call me Els."

"Too bad. So where were you guys?"

Adam sat down next to her and put his arm around her. I chose to sit on the arm chair.

"We took Ellie out to get some food since she never eats."

Nora nodded her head. She got up and went into the kitchen and started rummaging around. We were all surprised at the sudden end of the conversation, but we brushed it off. At least I was able to. Adam would actually have to deal with talking to her. Nora came back with a sandwich and we continued to sit there in silence. Matt called me and told me that he would be working till 12am so I decided once bedtime rolled around to get some sleep.

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The next day I didn't have work so when I woke up I grabbed my journal and started writing. Sometimes I would wake up with song lyrics stuck in my head for new songs so I always wrote them down right away. Today's lyric was 'I feel so much better now that you're gone forever. I tell myself that I don't miss you at all.'

I got dressed and went down to the living room to see that Adam and Nora were already awake. I didn't want them to feel like I was intruding so I went and grabbed a cereal bar and ate it in the kitchen. I was zoned out so I didn't realize that Adam was talking to me right away.

"Ellie?"

I blinked and looked at him. "Yeah?"

"Are you okay? I said your name like four times and it was like you couldn't hear me."

I smiled. "I'm fine. What did you need?"

Adam looked over at Nora and looked back at me. "Nora told me some things about you."

I mentally rolled my eyes. "Okay."

"And they aren't good things. And I just wanted to talk to you about it before I completely believe that they are true."

I wondered what she could have told him that warranted this kind of reaction. "Okay. Go on."

"So, the other day Nora said that you left your journal out."

"She read it didn't she?"

She stood up and walked over to us. "I had every right to. I saw my name."

I looked back at Adam.

"She said that you wrote about me. That you wrote about how you wanted to break us up so you could-" He stopped talking.

"Your not gonna say it?" She asked him. Adam didn't say anything so Nora looked me dead in the eyes.

"I read every single thing you wrote there. Like what your dad did. How you feel about your boyfriend, and most importantly how you feel about Adam."

I felt so small at that moment. Nora was spitting venom and I didn't know how to counteract it. Adam said her name to try to stop her because he noticed my discomfort but she kept going.

"You had no right to read what I wrote about my dad."

She laughed. "You deserved what he did to you. You weren't the victim."

"Why are you bringing all this up?

"Because you wrote about how you wanted to fuck my boyfriend and how you didn't care how it would affect everyone else."

I stood there in shock. "I didn't say that."

Adam looked at Nora. "Is all this true Nora?"

Was he really going to take her side?

"It's true. I read it all."

I looked at Adam. "I didn't write any of that. I don't feel that way about you. You have to believe me."

"I don't know."

Nora and I stared at each other. She thought she was going to win and make Adam hate me, but I came to an epiphany.

"How about I prove it then?"

Nora scoffed. "How?"

"I write all my entries in pen. I can't go back and change anything. You can read it and find out for yourself." I said. I looked at Adam.

"Okay. I'll read it."

I started to walk up the stairs and Adam followed me. Nora started to follow him, but he told her to stay behind. We went into the room I was staying in and I picked up the journal.

"So this has been my journal for six months. There is a lot of stuff in here. I recommend you start reading from the day we met till now so you can avoid reading about all my trauma. Um, if you end up concerned for my mental health, um, don't be. I'm always more dramatic when I'm writing so it's never as bad as it seems."

I handed him the journal. "Uh, good luck."

He took it and then looked up at me. "You know I believe you right? I really don't think you would do something like that. I just have to do this so I can actually prove that she's lying."

I chuckled. "I think your criteria on who can be your girlfriend needs to change cause that girl is wild."

"I know."

"I'll leave you to it then."

I left the room and walked down to the living room. Nora wasn't there so I sat on the couch. I felt so tense. He was actually going to read it. What would he think of me after reading about how much I hate myself? Would he still want to be friends with someone whos fucked in the head. All I could do was wait and count down the minutes until Matt came home so I could cry to him about this whole situation.