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iix. holidays

The holiday season was always something that Aeri dreaded. Back when she was a trainee, it was no problem for her to go a week without being able to train at the company seeing as she was still able to at home.

But now that she had debuted, she couldn't just go to another country—let alone continent—as she pleased.

Before, Heeseung had managed to convince her to spent the holidays with him and his family. But now that they weren't on speaking terms, she assumed the offer didn't stand anymore.

"Are you sure you don't want to come to my house? Riki's coming already. I don't think one more person would bother my parents," asked Jay as he rolled his suitcase towards the exit. 

Ever since the others noticed that the two oldest wouldn't be going on holidays together, Jay had been asking her to come with him.

But if it took nearly a week for Heeseung to convince her before, it wouldn't take a few days for Jay to do so. She just didn't want to be a burden and crash to anyone's house.

It was family holidays. For family. As much as she loved her members, she wasn't part of their family. She didn't share a similar DNA with any of them nor had she grown up with them.

They were just asking her to come with them out of sympathy anyway.

"Don't worry, some old friends from Belgium came to Korea last week, I'll probably spend time with them," she told him with a smile while pushing him outside of their dorm.

"Really? You didn't tell me that before," he raised his eyebrow, standing at the doorstep.

"You didn't ask," she shrugged, moving from the doorway to let the others pass through.

While everyone said their goodbyes to each other, Heeseung and Aeri barely looked at each other.

Was she really spending holidays with friends? Was she that unbothered by their friendship's downfall?

But he was too busy thinking about what he was going to his parents to stay focus on those questions.

He had been talking to his family about this girl he was going to bring with him for weeks. Telling them about how they were going to love her because of how polite and well-mannered she was.

Now, he was going to show up alone. He was sure that his parents were going to ask him a million question about this and he didn't know if he'd be able to answer them.

After Aeri closed the door behind them, she sighed and went to their room. It was so quiet. She usually loved silence but not this one.

This one felt lonely.

She couldn't stay in this place with the constant reminder of how alone she was during a time of the year where it was supposed to be filled with love.

So she decided to pack her bags and leave.

It wasn't as impulsive as it seemed to be. She had been thinking about leaving the place for holidays ever since her argument with Heeseung and now that she was finally alone, her decision was easily made.

Her bags were filled to the top when she left the building and went to her old apartment. Walking inside her room, she opened her wardrobe to fill it with her own clothes.

She remembered when she lived there, it would always be messy. Clothes were everywhere except in the compartment they should be in.

She also remembered how different her style was when she first arrived in this apartment compared to now. Before, she'd wear dresses and skirt all the time, loving the feel of the wind caressing her skin. Now she didn't even think she owned any of those items anymore.