𝗱𝗶𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂- 𝗺𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗼 𝗿𝗶𝗱𝗱𝗹𝗲

4-

y/n's pov-

Class was horrible. Everyone was staring and whispering and pointing. I felt naked, like i was in room with doctors and they were poking and prodding needles into my skin and analysing me without telling me why. I could feel their eyes bore into my skin, goosebumps rising on my arms, my skin crawling with disgust. The second i get back to my room after classes, i shrug off my robe and pace back and forth, wrenching my hair out of my ponytail, digging my nails into my palm. I can feel the skin on my lips ripping as i dig my teeth into it, chest heaving up and down. I can still feel the holes their eyes left inside of my skin, burning and itching.

I need a shower. I need to wash myself. I feel dirty , like everybody rubbed their muddy hands all over me. I run to the bathroom and close the door behind me, leaning over and turning on the tap as i block the drain. I tear off my clothes, peeling very layer back like it's sticking to my skin like tape. I push my discarded clothes in the corner and slip my body into the water. I hiss as the warm water surrounds me, burning my skin red. I close my eyes and grit my teeth, lowering myself fully. I reach over and turn the tap to cold, and a heavy breath leaves my chest as the feeling is regained in my toes. I gently and slowly lower myself up to shoulder length into the water, feeling the small ripples splash against my cheeks, the water following every movement my hand makes as  i swish it around. My eyes flutter closed at the feeling on water on my body, and without thinking , i let myself slip into the water, closing my eyes and holding my breath, hands gripping the sides of the bathtub. My eyes remain open as i dive under. I can see the blurry and misshapen form of the light slowly swaying before my eyes, burning my retinas. I close my eyes and instantly regret it. My earlier dream floats before my eyes, and i sit up, gasping. The sudden air hits my lungs and i grip the sides of the bathtub so hard my knuckles go white. I can feel the air, so suddenly cold, against my wet skin, making me loop my arms around my knees as i press them to my chest. I can feel tte water dripping down my back as it makes it's way off of my damp hair, every drop rolling down, every tiny plop it makes as it reaches the rest of the water....

"Y/n ? Are you in here ?" My head snaps up at the sound of Hermione's voice, the thudding of her footsteps and the heavy creaking thud of the door as it closes behind her. I look around, before unplugging the drain and standing up, watching as the water disappears down the drain, forming a twirl inside the water as it goes down. I reach for my towel and wrap it around myself, straining my hair over the sink.

"Y/n !" Hermione calls out again. The drain gurgles as it swallows up the rest of the water.

"I'm in here, Hermione. Give me a second !" I yell back. My feet thud against the soft material of the rug as i wipe them and push open the door, droplets of water rolling down my shoulders, my calves, my neck. Hermione is sitting on my bed, hands folded neatly over her knees. I tug the towel tighter around me, leaving the comforting and humid fog in the bathroom behind to join her in the cold air filtering in through the open window in my room. She clears her throat as i reach for my clothes and slip on a pair of underwear all while wearing the towel.

"Uh, can i help you, Hermione ?" I say, shielding my body from her view as i slip on the rest of my clothes. I step into her view just as i smooth out the creases in my shirt, making her look up. She sighs, standing up and walking over to me.

"Look, Y/n.. About what i said the other day-" My mouth falls open and i cut her off.

"Hermione-"

"No, no, let me finish this." She fiddles with left thumb, her right thumb pushing in the joint and her pointer finger pushing it back up. "I'm so so sorry.. Y/n, i didn't mean it. I had just had a bad day, and i know that doesn't give me an excuse. I've been trying to apologise to you all day, but i haven't seen you at all. I'm so sorry, Y/n. That was rude of me to say, and i don't even know what overtook me to say that, and i regretted it as soon as it left my mouth." I sigh heavily and look up at her, lips pursed. Her face contorts in a pained expression, her head tilted to the side as a small whimper leaves her lips.

"Can you forgive me ?" She mutters, quietly. I smile, nodding slowly as i sit down on my bed and pat my side for her to join me.

"I forgive you. But don't ever do that again." She chuckles breathlessly, sinking down besides me and letting her head drop on my shoulder. She sniffles as i gently loop my arm around her waist, pulling her in. She lifts her legs up to cradle them close to her chest, her foot hitting my bag on the way up. My bad tips over, the contents of it spilling out. The letter slides against the hardwood floors, the sound catching our attention.

"What is that ?" Hermione asks. I get up and walk over, picking it up.

"A letter, but pansy told me not to open it.. Because there's no sender's address it's just adressed to me." I reply, walking back to Hermione with the letter in my hands.

"Unless..." I say, gently tapping my pointer finger in the fold of the envelope, thinking as i sit back down next to her. Hermione whines.

"Oh god. Please don't say what i think you're about to say."

"You open it for me. Pansy will never know, and i never technically opened it..." I say, holding the letter towards her. Hermione shakes her head, standing up.

"i love you, Y/n, but that's too far." I pout, whining.

"Please, Mione ? You owe me. I mean, you did make pretty harmful comments the other night and now that i think about it i'm not sure i'm ready to forgive you yet.." Her ears go red in anger and embarrassment , rolling her eyes as she stomps her foot on the ground before extending her arm out. She opens and closes her hand, and i squeal as i hand her the letter.

" Oh ! Thank you, thank you, thank you !" I say, clapping my hands as i jump up and down. In a swift movement, her nail slices through the glue keeping the envelope closed and she peels the paper back . A sheet of lined paper is removed from the envelope, a paper i know too well. It looks like it's been teared out of a book, the jagged edges poking awkwardly out of the edge. Hermione clears her throat as she starts reading.

"Dear Y/n, i am writing you this letter to-" She cuts herself off, staring at the paper as her eyes go wide.

"Writing this letter to what ? Hermione !" I say, trying to pry the letter out of her hands. She shakes her head, folding the letter up.

"Pansy was right. You shouldn't read this.."

"Does it say who it's from ?" She shakes her head.

"Uh- no. Just some stalker i assume." She looks around anxiously, biting her bottom lip,

"How about i stay with you tonight ? Do you think that's a good idea ? Girls sleepover ?" I frown but nod slowly, picking at the skin on my bottom lip.

"Uh, yeah, i guess so.." I mutter. She smiles, but i can tell something is wrong. Her breathing is labored and beads of sweat are rolling down her face.

"Alright, great ! Let me go fetch my things. I'll be right back." She leaves, closing the door behind her loudly. I state at it for a moment, the static of the empty room filling my ears.

What in the world just happened ?