Chapter Five: Road to Recovery

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Chris sat in the cafe, drinking coffee black while his eyes scanned over the other male's body. He was reading a book, face full of innocent bliss as he read softly. The brunette's mind returned to Jill's death and a frown found his lips. "I can't stop thinking about her..." He began, seeing the other male send him a curious glance.

"I know Chris..." He replied innocently. He then reached across the table to gently caress Chris' hand with his thumb. "And you know I'm here for you..."

"I know..." He nodded, mind going back to the empty grave and Jill's last moments. It gave him nightmares and the male across from him knew. He knew and wasn't sure how to help for fear of crossing a boundary, but Chris wanted that. He so desperately wanted the male to hold him to his chest like he had when he first came home. To always hold him like that, face burrowed into his chest and hearing his heartbeat.

He hung his head slightly and caught his reflection in the coffee, a broken man staring back up at him. The other male put his hand over the coffee, hands tenderly placing themselves under his chin and lifting so he could meet his eyes. "It's okay Chris." He spoke, his heart fluttering when he heard Chris softly utter his name in a whisper. "It's okay..."

When they had returned home Chris pinned the male to the front door after they'd gotten inside. He saw the flash of fear turn into curiosity as the other male looked at him. "Why are you being so calm about this?" He asked, holding onto the males biceps.

"Because I don't know what happened... and you can't tell me anything." He answered genuinely. "I'm trying to help, but I can't help if I don't know everything."

"I can't.."

"I'm not asking you to tell me more Chris.." His loud tone softened as he felt Chris' grip on his arms falter. "I'm just trying to help, I just don't know how..." Chris snaked his arms around the male's waist and hugged him tightly to his body.

"Just be here with me..." He whispered, breath hot along the other males neck and ear. It made his chest flutter and heart race, but he pushed it aside. Whatever that was can wait, Chris' sanity always comes first. When the male pulled back the smaller of the two gently smiled and held onto Chris' biceps.

"Any better?" He saw a longing look in the brunette's eyes, that darkened when he'd asked the question. He watched Chris lean forward slightly before pulling back and shaking his head.

"Yeah... Much better." He answered quietly.

He smiled genuinely and held onto his hand. "Why don't we get you to the couch? Hm? And I'll grab you a weighted blanket?"

"No I..." Chris began, shaking his head. "I don't think I can handle having something heavy weighing on me right now."

"But of course. Maybe just a normal blanket?"

"What about you?"

"We can share." He laughed softly, smiling innocently. He saw the look in Chris' eyes and continued to smile, much more shyly. "That's not what you meant, is it?"

"No..." The brunette whispered softly, hugging the male to his chest. "I just want you next to me..."

"It's a little bit clingy Chris. I don't mean to push you away either, I just feel a little suffocated..."

"I'm sorry..." Chris mumbled into his ear, burrowing his face in the shorter male's neck. "Just this once, okay?"

The smaller of the two nodded, walking backwards until they fell onto the couch. Chris laying on top of the male as he perched himself up with his forearms. The position made Chris think, could this be why Jill's body wasn't there? Why take her body anyway? To torment him? He was pulled from his thoughts by the soft hand caressing his cheek and a loving stare.

"Chris?" His angelic voice called to himself d before he could stop himself he leaned down and tenderly pressed his lips to the male's. He felt him tense slightly, but lean further into the kiss. He gently cupped Chris' face in his hands before the brunette lifted up and away from him.

"I don't know what came over me..." He muttered, feeling like a weight lifted off of his chest. In truth the other male had that same thought and feeling.

"It's okay..." He answered, pulling Chris down against his chest. The larger brunette's head rested over his heart as he listened to it jackhammer in his chest. "I..." He began, but hesitated. Would Chris find it weird that he liked it? Would he be disgusted? Does he feel the same way? He decided to avoid it for now, or forever should it be possible. "I think you're just stressed and in need of a god nap."

"Maybe." The male returned, listening as the pounding heart calmed to its normal and steady pace. "I..." He began. How would the man laying under him feel if he confessed he liked it? That he wanted more? He could feel his face tinting the lightest shade of pink. Could he risk the only person he told about Jill? He shook his head. "I think a nap would be great."

"Then go ahead and get some rest."

Then they realized something. They were cuddled up on the couch together, any awkward tension long since gone. Which helped them realize they had to have feelings for one another as their eyes locked once again. Chris began to lean in, the other male starting to lean upwards before a knock on the front door startled them.

Chris sighed and placed a chaste kiss to the center of the male's forehead before getting up and answering the door. Standing there was a young girl who, much to Chris' dismay, looked exactly like Jill. She wore a green beret with the Girl Scout logo on the side. "Hello sir!" She greeted chipperly. "We're selling cookies to help fund the local animal shelter! I was wondering if I could interest you in some cookies?"

Chris felt the shorter male approach and peek around his broad shoulders to see the young girl. This made the taller brunette chuckle softly and nod. "Yeah kid, Whatcha got?" And thus she explained each and every cookie she had in her rusty green wheelbarrow thing. And Chris bought almost every single one she had, almost. The girl left, smiling widely as she thanked him dearly and walked away with a skip to the next home over. He closed the door to see the other male smiling sweetly at him. "Whaaaat? I like cookies sometimes. Let me have my cheat day." Chris whines softly, smiling guiltily afterwards before his jaw dropped the second the male snatched one of the samoas from the top. "You put that back right this instant."

"Mm~ But I love cookies~" He mocked playfully. "Let me have my cheat day~" Chris set the boxes on the counter, as did the other male.

"That was very kind of you Chris." He spoke gently.

"She looked just like Jill." He blurted out before he could stop himself. He saw a small flash of disappointment flash in the males eyes before it was replaced with love and care.

"Then how about we call this the road to moving on? Even if it takes you years... I'll always be here Chris. I promise."

"Don't make promises you can't keep."

"Chris I-"

"That wasn't me..." He mumbled, body tensed up as he turned to look at a masked man watching them from the doorway. He was leaned against the wood, eyeing the shorter male with a sinister malice. Chris glanced at the male and saw his eyes widening by the second.

"No..."

"No? You knew this would happen you spoiled little brat!" The man snapped, beginning to approach. Chris stepped in the way to keep them separated, which caused the man to hesitate. "My quarrel isn't with you. Get out of my way."

"No. You can't take him." Chris answers with a growl.

"I didn't want to do this..." The masked man sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "But you're leaving me no choice." With a snap of his fingers men shrouded in black swarmed the kitchen and restrained Chris, the brunette watching in horror as the main masked man snatched the shorter male by his throat and spoke quietly to him. So quietly Chris wished desperately that he could hear. Someone slammed the butt of their rifle into the side of his head, knocking him out while they dragged the other male away.

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