𝗮𝗹𝗺𝗼𝘀𝘁.

nine.

   I watch as Ellie tries to treat Joel, the man struggling to breathe, gripping her hand. He tries to catch his breath while talking, "leave, you leave."

   Ellie yells at him, "Joel shut the fuck up!"

   Joel grabs her jacket, pulling her closer, "you leave, go north, to Tommy. Take Athy and the gun," he pushes her away, "you go."

   The two share eye contact for a moment before Ellie stands, covering the man with his jacket. She stares down at him for a moment before charging up the stairs, calling over her shoulder to me, "watch him."

   Joel now shifts his eyes to me, my eyes widening at his state.

   In the back of my mind the memory of my brother's deaths play on repeat.

   The feeling of vomit pushing itself up my throat.

   The sound of my screams.

   "Athy," Joel whispers.

   I snap out of my thoughts, shifting my eyes back to Joel. He looks so vulnerable, almost scared. Seeing him like this scares me.

   Joel is never scared.

   Joel is scary.

   I slowly crawl over to him, stopping right beside his mattress. I hold his eye contact as I tentatively reach for his hand. Joel allows me to slip my fingers into his and I smile at how warm they are.

   Pursing my lips I take in a deep breath, "everything's gonna be okay, it's all okay."

   I say this more to comfort myself than him.

   Joel just nods, his eyes trained on me as I avert mine.

   "We won't let you die."

* * *

   Hearing a creak in the steps my eyes snap open and I sit up from where I was leaning on Joel. I slowly rub my eyes, Ellie rushing down the steps. She throws the jacket off of Joel, grabbing his hand for a brief moment.

   There's a communication between their eye contact, one that I am not a part of.

   Receiving a silent okay from him she lifts his shirt, removing the bloody rag from his wound. She opens the small sewing kit she got from who knows where.

   Gritting her teeth, Ellie shifts her eyes to me, "hold him down."

   I nod, turning to block Joel's view of Ellie's diy surgery. She inserts the first needle and Joel lets out a groan, gripping onto the shoulder of my jacket.

   He bites his tongue, his face turning red as Ellie continues.

   I hold onto his hand tightly, "it's okay, it's okay."

* * *

   Ellie lifts Joel's shirt, looking to see if anything new has happened with his injury. Seeing everything is somewhat okay, she picks up a bowl of water, wetting his lips with a small smile, "you thirsty?"

   She then pulls out a packet of jerky, ripping it apart and placing a piece on Joel's chest before handing one to me.

   I slowly eat it, watching as Ellie desperately waits for Joel to take the food.

   He doesn't.

   She sits silently for a moment before turning to me. She gives me a soft smile, "I'm gonna be right back okay? I'm gonna get us some real food."

   I shake my head at her, "you can't go alone."

   The thought of Ellie getting injured was unbearable. Then we would really be fucked.

   "You need to stay here with Joel," she instructs, "I'll be fine."

   I shift my eyes to Joel before looking back at her.

   "Okay, please be careful."

* * *

   I watch Ellie pace outside as our horses eat the snow she collected for them. I look back to the intricate braid I'm doing on my horse as he eats.

   Things have calmed a bit since Joel got injured. Ellie told me she shot a deer and traded it with these two men for penicillin that she injected into Joel yesterday.

   Suddenly the squawking of birds fills the air as a flock takes flight from a tree. Ellie looks up at the sky for a moment before running out into the street. She disappears and I step out into the snow after her, "Ellie?"

   She comes back into view, sprinting to me, "people, they're here!"

   She runs past me back down into the basement, shaking Joel awake, "Joel wake up! Wake the fuck up!"

   Ellie grabs her knife, wrapping Joel's hands around the handle, "listen to me there are men coming okay? I'm gonna lead them away but if anybody comes down here you fucking kill them you got it? You've gotta protect Athy."

   Joel's eyes seem to roll back, Ellie shaking him again, "Joel! Joel, do not fall asleep!"

   She turns to me, "get your gun out and stay down here with Joel," she cups my cheeks with her cold hands, looking into my eyes, "nobody is coming down here okay? You'll be fine."

   I shake my head, my eyes wide, "y-you can't go by yourself, stay down here with us!"

   Ellie shakes her head, "I'm okay, I'll be okay."

   She runs back upstairs and I can hear the scraping of her moving something to cover the door. A few more minutes pass before I hear gunshots.

   Each shot makes my heart jump.

   I look from Joel to my gun, trying to count in my head but I keep losing my number. I can't stand it, I jump up and run over to the basement window, pushing it open. I climb on top of boxes and push myself through into the snow.

   I make it out into the street and spot Ellie's horse on the ground, a crowd of men not far from it but no sign of Ellie. I sneak around the trees to get closer, no able to see Ellie, unconscious in the middle of the group.

   My breath hitches and I press my back into a tree. Then before thinking I quickly turn and fire off a shot, the bullet skimming one of the men's faces. They all turn to me and I turn back, praying they didn't see me.

   As I hear footsteps approach I know I have no choice.

   I jump from my hiding spot, firing off four more bullets at the approaching men and hitting two of them. As I go to shoot at the one closest to me I realize I'm out of bullets.

   My heart drops.

   He reaches for me and I dodge his hand, kneeing him between his legs. One of the men I shot comes stumbling forward, "you little bitch."

   He swings the end of his rifle at me and I don't have time to dodge.

   Next thing I know I'm in the snow, staring up at the blue sky.