The Last of Us

Epilogue

Six months later

"You realise we are going for a month and not a year, right?"

I'm sitting on top of my suitcase while Danni grunts every few seconds to clarify her point; I'm an over-packer.

I'd only realised once we'd booked our girls' trip to Europe this summer. A few weeks basking in the sun in Italy and Greece to take our minds off the last six months.

I'd taken a hiatus from public speaking. The support group was also on hold, but I hoped to one day bring that back once everything had calmed down.

Ultimately, all I wanted to do was help others, and I knew I'd return to that one day. Right now, though, I'm focusing on my damn suitcase.

It had taken a lot of convincing from Mum and Danni to get me to leave the country. It almost felt insensitive to everyone that had lost so much. I wasn't sure that I truly deserved it.

The turning point had been Mum's big speech that she'd sat me down for a few months ago.

"You know how you said to me that day in the bathroom that you would put yourself first for once? Well, this is it. This is the moment."

Danni has wanted to go to Europe her whole life, and it sounded alright. I wouldn't mind learning a new language.

"Our flight also leaves in three hours, but no hurry."

"Three hours is still a long time."

"Not for an international flight, it's not," she retorts.

Danni pokes her finger into the bag, moving the fabric out of the way. She grunts again, using both hands to pull at the zip now. It's almost made it the whole way around but gets caught on one of the fifteen summers dressed I'd packed.

"This is ridiculous," she grumbles. "You better not be expecting to use the extra space in my bag for when you buy souvenirs over there."

"Duh," I roll my eyes, "of course, I will be."

Danni closes the zipper the rest of the way around with a satisfied sigh. She dramatically sat back, like it was the most demanding job of her life.

A truck horn honks outside my house, and I wonder if it's another moving van. I'd noticed over the past week that Ben was slowly moving the furniture out of his house.

He'd been cleared of any manslaughter charges. I'd heard the bare facts, and that's all I needed. I didn't want to pay any more attention to anything that involved a story about him. I knew I'd never let go otherwise.

Mum still acted like a friendly neighbour, but she never pushed me. I was grateful that she understood that boundary. She'd told me he was moving out as soon as his lease was up. I guess that was this week.

"It'll be easier," Danni says, watching me closely. "It'll be easier when he isn't living right next to you anymore."

I nod, gripping the handle of my suitcase as I stand it up. The wheels spin, moving towards my door before stopping with a thud as it hits the wall.

I make a mental checklist, ticking off everything I've completed as I do a quick spin of my room.

"Girls! If we don't hurry soon, you'll miss the plane!"

"That's what I've been trying to tell her for the past two hours!" Danni hollers.

"Coming!" I answer, grabbing my suitcase and handbag as I carry the luggage out of my room.

Mum stands in the entry, a bright smile covering her lips, almost cracking her face. She looks the happiest I've seen her in a while. I know she'll miss me, but she's had just as much fun planning everything with us. It's taken her mind off reminiscing over Dad, like I know she often does.

She grabs both of our suitcases, kicking the front door open to lug them down the steps.

"Do you need any—"

"Nope! I've got it!" she replies happily, struggling to manoeuvre our bags towards the car.

"Are you sure—"

"I've been working on my upper arm strength, Harlow! Let my muscles shine, please!"

It's such a bizarre comment from her that I can't help but laugh as she finally wrestles the bags into the boot of her car. Every day she was beginning to sound more and more like her old self.

Danni walks ahead of me now, starting a conversation with my Mum about how bad I've become with time management since I'd taken time off. I almost reply, but I catch a glimpse of movement out of the corner of my eye.

Ben is helping a removalist with a coffee table. They walk on each end of the piece of furniture, carrying it towards the truck parked in the driveway.

I hadn't been this close to him in a few months now. I'd avoided as much contact as possible. If I came home just as his car pulled up, I'd wait until he was inside to get out of my car. Sometimes, I notice him linger momentarily, almost as if he was waiting for me. He always went inside, though.

I didn't realise I'd been staring until I noticed the removalist wasn't with him anymore. He must have returned inside to clear something else out of the house.

Ben turns around, spotting me instantly. At first, I think he will look away, giving me the out I usually would take. Instead, I offer him a small wave.

He doesn't know what to do with it, and a rush of pain hits my chest. We were nothing more than strangers now—nearly ex-neighbours who once shared a common interest in catching a killer. Maybe even something more profound.

He finally waves back, giving me a slight tilt of the head. Almost a nod, but not quite. At least he smiles. It's practically the same smile he used to give me before we knew anything about each other. Back when I tried so hard to avoid him.

How funny that life has gone full circle now. So much has happened between us that we can never return from.

He will say something to me, but his focus is removed from our exchange. Two people emerge from the front door, carrying his couch. I hear him ask if they need help, and I realise it's the first time I've heard his voice in forever. I'd almost forgotten what it sounded like.

"Harlow!" Mum calls from the driver's seat.

I rush down the driveway, peeling my eyes away from Ben. I hadn't realised they were both in the car now.

"Sorry," I say breathlessly, climbing into the passenger seat.

"Ready?" Mum asks.

I click my seatbelt in and glance out the window briefly to see Ben walking away from me, striding calmly up the front steps. I see him turn his head slightly, almost like he's searching for me one last time.

Once he disappears from view, I catch Mum watching me. I give her a natural smile, something I haven't done in a while. Danni claps her hands gleefully as we pull away from the curb. Once we're on the plane, I will make fun of her for that.

"Ready," I answer.