A Specific Mood

🕳️Falling🕳️

I wish you could see me
But at the same time I wish you couldn't,
I'm still in bed at three
I know I shouldn't.

Would you be proud of me
If I still keep lying around?
Would you still want me
If I keep falling on the ground?

One day I'm good
The next day I'm not,
I think I've finally understood
Why I missed my shot.

I keep begging for you
Wishing to meet you again,
I'm sure we will after this is all through
It's just a matter of when.

Have I already lost you?
Please tell me I have not,
My dreams come into view
And you're the only one I've got.

You've left me broken
But you fail to see it,
But you're also the token
Which makes me fail to quit.

I still have hope in you
It's what keeps me going,
But I'm afraid you weren't the one I once knew
You just seem to be growing.

I'm afraid you'll 'grow' away
I'm afraid that you'll 'grow' to forget,
And when we meet again some day
You won't remember and I'll be upset.

Please come back
I really hope you do,
I have a paper stack
With letters I wanna give you.

But before coming back
I want you to leave,
All you give me now is an anxiety attack
And all I want now is some relief.

I get so confused
Whether I'm mad or sad,
Because I know I've left you bruised
And I know that it's bad.

I just need you to reassure
That you'll always be okay,
Even though I know you'll endure
Everything that'll come in your way.