Michael Jackson x abused Reader

15 Idea

I finish off and calm down. Shit that felt good. I forgot how good it can feel. I go to the bathroom and wash my hands, then lay back on my bed. Thinking about him. I love him so much. I want to let him have sex with me but I'm scared. Should I just do it? No I can't. I don't even know what he likes, what he's into or how big he is. What if he's hella big? I don't know how much I can take for my first, non abuse sex after years.. What would I even tell him? 'Sorry you're too big, you can't fuck me'? That sounds stupid. I like it big usually but,.. I don't know..

Maybe we should just keep it at what we have now? No.. I don't want that. Maybe, lots of foreplay and no sex? That would get us both started.. That's dumb. Unless maybe, we could like, do foreplay, lots of foreplay and then we just touch ourselfs in front of each other? No that sounds weird. Hmm.

*knock knock*
"(Y/n)? Are you okay?" I hear him say through the door worryingly. "I'm fine, I just need a bit time to think about something". "Okay darling, I'll be in my room".

Where was I? Oh right. What else could we do where we both get pleasure and I feel comfortable? Hmm... I can't just let him do it.. I'm scared. Wait. We can have sex without his thing in me. I totally forgot fingering and licking exists. Well. I gotta give him something in return tho.. I could suck him off? Gosh, thinking about this is already getting me wet again. Maybe if we do that, I'll at some point feel comfortable with him fucking me. Yeah. I think that's it. I'm just gonna have to convince myself that I'm comfy doing that. Oh and I have to ask him of course. Hm. Okay.

I walk out of my room and to his. *knock knock* "Come in!" he says. I enter his room and see him laying on his bed. I quickly slide under his blanket and hug him tightly. He giggles, "Aw honey, you're so cute". I lay on his stomach and look at him. I prop myself over him and grab his face with one hand, kissing him deeply. He kisses back instantly and his hands slowly make their way to my waist. I seperate the kiss move down a bit, kissing his neck. "More comfortable already hm~?". "A bit~" I say then suck on his neck. "Mh~ Where's all of this coming from~?". "I just, since you gave me hickeys, I want to give you at least one". He chuckles, "Oh really~?". "Mhm~" I say then bite down. "Ngh~!" he groans. I bite down a bit harder and grind my hips against his crotch. "Oh god (y/n)..". His hands grip my waist a bit tighter, "Do you know what you're doing right now~?". "No, but I guess it'll leave you turned on~". "So you're not okay with sex but with teasing~?". I chuckle, "You could say that~".

I come to my senses. Shit. What am I doing? I was in a total trance. I get off him and blush. "(Y/n)? Are you okay?". "I- I'm sorry, I don't know what got over me- I.. god that's embarrassing..". "It's okay, calm down honey" he tells me and rolls over, reaching his arms out. I hug him tightly. "I love you sweetheart". "I love you too Mikey" I mumble into his chest. I let go after a couple of minutes. "You know.. I thought I was able to do this, I thought I was ready..". "It's alright honey, no need to rush yourself". "Yes but.. I've been thinking. I came to the conclusion that I might be more comfortable with us doing a lot of foreplay and then stop, but then we'd both end up, well, turned on". "True that..". "So then I thought, what if we do that, but.. I don't have to like uhm, have your dick in me. You uhm.. Could just lick and finger me" I say and my face turns really red.

He chuckles softly, "Aw, you'd like that~?". My face gets redder, "W-well, yeah.. But, I just, I can't somehow.. I was gonna suck your dick in return but.. I chickened out again". "Oh honey, it's alright. It does sound real good though, I'ma take you up on that offer as soon as you're ready, but take your time please". "I love you Mikey, I love you so much". "Aw, I love you too honey". I hug him tight, "You don't know how relieved I am that you're okay with my decisions and that you treat me so nicely". "I'm happy to hear that, I just want to treat you like the queen that you are" he smiles brightly. "Mhh stop it you're making me blush". "That's my goal honey~". I blush harder and hide my face in his chest.

He giggles, "You're so cute, I'm also really happy that you feel so comfortable with me". "That's because you're a real nice gentleman" I say and look up at him, I grab his face and whisper, "my gentleman~". I kiss him passionately and he kisses back. We separate it, "You know you're on my mind 24/7 right? I can't get my mind off you, you're so pretty, cute, funny, kind, loving.. I love you sweetheart". My face flushes a bit, "I love you too honeyyyy". I lay my head on his chest and snuggle closer to him. "Tired already?" he giggles. "Mhmmm" I groan. He runs his fingers through my hair gently.

He kisses my head. "Mikey? Do we have anything planned tomorrow?". "We're gonna go grocery shopping". "Okay, well.. Goodnight Mikey I love you" I say and look up at him. "I love you too darling, goodnight". We share a short kiss and I fall asleep on his chest.