20 facts/OR MORE about your fucking crazy author.
Featuring: The 'Diabolik Lovers' cast.
-WARNING-
Will contain violent grammar- insolent humor, mild sexual content- and possibly use of drugs. So; basically...* loads shotguns * your gonna need one of these badass bitchez.
*Flips on shades* so get ur asses ready.
A/N: NOTHIN SHALL BE EDITED- ITS BOOTYFUL...
-START-
Author-san: Hi fellow snicker fucks! Welcome to the one and only 20 facts about this * points to self * crazy bitch. Also- welcoming the very famous and rich dick-head guest's, the Sakamaki- Mukami, and Tsukinami brothers~!
* Everyones faces be like *: O---O
Kanato: * Slumps reluctantly while clutching teddy tightly * Do you really have to call us that- * my name *-san?
Author-san: * Throws coffee cup at his head (which breaks) * WHO THE HELL TOLD YOU TO CALL ME BY MY NAME YOU LITTLE SHIT!?!?!? You address me as Hime-sama you little twat ass motherfucker!
* Everyone be like * ;----; "PLZ DUN KILL MEH" expressions activated.
Author-san: Anyway * Sighs * Lets get on with this bullshit so I can go back to my doujin~! I need all the smut I can get in my life.
* Everyone still be like * O---O "DUN COME NEAR ME CRAZY HOE" expression activated.
Author-san: *Looks over with death glare* Talk back to me or say unneeded things I swear to Jehovah witness I will shove a knife up your ass- pull it out your stomach, then stick it in your eye and stab the fuck out of your eye sockets. Got it bitch(es)? (* INSERTS SARCASM * In no possible way this is at all related to Ermac from Mortal Kombat...no way...)
Everyone: *Goes Silent and shivers * O---O
Author-san: Anyway again! To number one! Reiji, my bitch for today- what's the first question. Or otherwise fact I need to make a big fucking speech for. You have ten seconds to answer or I'll shove a bomb down your throat.
Reiji: Umm.....
Author-san: 10. . .9. . .8. . .
Everyone: SHE'S REALLY FUCKING COUNTING....
Reiji: * Runs light speed and grabs stack of documents *
Author-san: 5. . .4. . .
Reiji: Why the hell are you still counting!?!?!?
Author-san: You're suppose to read the damn thing you fucking nitwit. . .
Reiji: Ok- * My name *, the first thing is. . .
Author-san: * grabs bomb * What did you just call me?
Reiji: * sweatdrops * N-NOTHING O---O
Author-san: I preferably said to address me as 'Hime-sama'. . .you are now to be punished you worthless fool.
Reiji: * Run's around mansion while im chasing him with a un-started bomb * PLZ SPARE ME HIME-SAMA! PLZ FOR THE LOVE OF GOD LEAVE ME BE WITH YOUR CRAZY FUCKING BOMB!
Author-san: WATCH UR FOUL LANGUAGE MISTER, I'LL MAKE SURE TO REPLACE UR WORDS WITH THIS BOMB YOU DEMISE SO MUCH BITCH! *run's him into a empty room- corners him, then throws the bomb (which is now started at countdown of 5 seconds) and does a over-reacted barrel roll out the bedroom door to cover. *
Reiji: WHY U DO DIS!? WHY YOU WASTE TAH MONAY? ;-----;
Author-san: Because you suck big donkey penis!