Bright

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I switched on the TV and started snacking. This Jeff was slowly driving me crazy with his kindness. I had to keep reminding myself we are colleagues collaborating on a project and once done, our paths wouldn't cross.

I saw him from my peripheral view as he came in. He packed his things, mentioning about heading home first. I agreed, seeing him off. Once he left, I just stood against the door sighing. I had chased him away inevitably with my choice of words but also knew I hated that.

The next few weeks saw us busy but there was something about our dynamics that was changing. The chemistry between us was just building up. The song that we had wrote together, it was starting to hit me more personally. I started feeling the lyrics as I sang it more. It all came to a standstill a week before the concert.

We were in the recording studio about to record the song. I was waiting for Jeff to finish up another engagement before he came over. I was just looking at the lyrics. My manager told me to give it 1 try first before Jeff came. I agreed.

As my heart listens
For that first beat
That first hum
I couldn't help but wonder
Over the signal it was sending me

It sounds like love
But is it?
Oh dear one
Will you tell me before day sees night
Or is it a mystery that will be unsolved?

I hope to be able to express myself
Before it's all for nought
But everytime I see your eyes
My heart just stops a little bit more
It then beats a little faster
A little quicker

[Chorus]
If this isn't love
Tell me what it is
If this isn't feelings
Tell me what it is
Why do my lips quiver
To call you by name?

If this isn't love
Tell me what it is
If this isn't feelings
Tell me what it is

If this isn't love
Tell me what it is
If this isn't feelings
Tell me what it is
Why does my heart stop
Everytime it sees you

I sang the song, softly, hitting the notes precisely but the meaning of the song was hitting me harder as Jeff's face kept flashing. As I hit the chorus, I looked looked up to see Jeff in the room, watching me silently. My voice cracked abit and he smoothly took over, just singing the chorus, his eyes on me the entire time.

The practice ended well and our managers clapped in joy, going on about how amazing it was and how we were going to nail the concert. I just looked at Jeff who was staring back at me stonily.

We turned back to our managers, smiling and they left, leaving us to our own devices. I looked at Jeff. He was clenching his hands tightly as if he was stopping himself from saying something.

"How was the other engagement P?"

Jeff looked at me and just bit his tongue.

"It was fine Bright. Thanks for asking. Do you want to practice 1 more time?"

I nodded hesitantly. Did I really want to? I had no choice but I knew if I practiced again, I may end up just breaking down. But I had to suck it in. I nodded at Jeff who set it up again. However, this time, Jeff asked if he could sing 1 time. I agreed letting him take the vocals whilst I got on the keyboard.

As I played the opening notes, Jeff's melodious voice broke out. His voice wrapped over each and every note, bringing them to life. He knew how to bring out the best of each note and at the chorus, his voice broke. I stopped playing and turned to look at him. He was sobbing softly.

"Phi..."

"Answer me just 1 thing. Who comes to mind when you sing this song?"

I kept quiet.

Jeff repeated his question again and again. Finally I looked at him and muttered, "You."

"Then why are you still calling me Phi? Is that what you really want? Kindness and not feelings?"

I was stumped and looked at Jeff, my face finally breaking out of character. No more poker face. Just stricken, knowing that I had hurt Jeff.

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