Things We Have in Common

Chapter 10 - I Missed You

And suddenly life wasn't about living, it was about surviving.
-Unknown
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warning: you may cry, be prepared. also a little bit of spice.

.....I hope Joy is getting better. Please let me know. By the time this letter reaches you, I will be visiting at the Cranes Estate. I wanted to visit Eloise in which I am hoping it goes well. Please write back as soon as possible.
A letter from Elizabeth to Ashton.

    I woke sitting straight up from bed. Eloise's arm fell off me. I was breathing heavily. I put my hand on my chest to try and calm myself. Eloise woke up with blinking eyes, "Liz, whats wrong-"

   She sat up when she saw the tears in my eyes, she grabbed my hand and tilted my face towards hers, "Its okay, its okay it was just a nightmare." I fell into her. Why did every chance of happiness I got, it was instantly ruined. She held me close. "Calm down Elizabeth it was just a night terror. It wasn't real." Through small breaths I said, "Do you really want me here?" She stopped.

   "Elizabeth is that even a question? I have waited every day for you to arrive since I was married. In fact I wished you would have ordered a carriage out the next day. I wanted you here so bad. I re read those books ten times just because they reminded me of you. I overlooked your annotations every chance I got. It was all the things I would have underlined too because we have so much in common. Too much. As soon as I gave birth of Elizabeth, the first person who came to mind was you, and I wished you were there in that moment. I wish you were holding my hand as I screamed. I only needed you in that moment. I love you Elizabeth don't you understand?"

   I kissed her so hard. I laid on top of her kissing her neck down to her chest and breasts. I heard her gasp and I covered my mouth with hers again. "I love you too Eloise. I thought about you every moment back at home. Even in my sleep, you appeared in my dreams. Everyday I saw the empty space on my bookshelf and thought of you. The day Francesca and I put my books on my new shelves at Martins estate, I left a spot open because I needed reminders of you. I never sent you a letter because I was scared you didn't love me anymore. If I knew it all then, I would have sent you a letter instantly."
 
     She smiled at me with tears in her eyes, "You have a place in my heart no one else could ever have."
I kissed her again, soft and slowly. Everything was frozen in this moment. I never wanted it to unfreeze. I wanted to be in this moment forever.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

My two weeks came and went. Eloise and I spent much of our time together. Sir Phillip understood that we hadn't seen each other in quite sometimes. We walked with Baby Elizabeth in the woods together. We snuck in kisses when we could. I laid awake at night, finding myself, lost in her eyes.

A few days before I left, I received two of the most dreadful letters.
One being the death of Joy.
Another being that Samantha was ill. Something possibly deathly.

    I opened Ashtons letter first and I sunk to the floor. Eloise rushed down to hold me, I opened the second letter and broke even more. I could heard glass shattering in the back of my mind.

"I have to go home." I told her. I looked into her eyes, "Please come with me Eloise. Please." She nodded but worry still sat on her face. She ordered a carriage to leave that night. She brought Elizabeth with us. I sat silent in the carriage. Not even the small baby's cooing could put a smile on my face. Not even Eloise holding my hand.

    I thought about Joy. Her kindness to me in so many ways. She showed the world to Ashton. I remember how he use to stare at her when we would be out, before they were wed. When he wasn't looking, I noticed she always had her eyes on him. There was never another women that made his eyes sparkle. She had been like an older sister to me, supporting me always and being there when others couldn't. She had the kind of spirit to make anyone happy, even in their darkest of days. Even in mine.