make me remember.

two

it had taken bexley roughly ten minutes before she dared to call out my name. "mai," she had said, barely raising her voice enough for me to hear her from the open doorway of my room.
it was close to noon, and this was the fourth time i had heard her calling, the forth time she had stopped by, each time lowering her voice as if i would cut her head off for making noise. "how are you?"
"perfectly fine," i reply, continuing to roam through a few of the shirts in my closet. "for the fourth time." i glance over my shoulder, looking back at her as she shrugs.
"the princes are arriving." she says, and i see how she holds her breath. i frown in her direction, wondering just why they all expect me to freak out. why they've all tipped toed around me for the past few days.
"okay," i say unsure of how to react before turning back towards the closet. "are atlas and graham there to greet them?"

"yes." she says, shifting the weight from one foot to the other. "will you be there, as well?"

"didn't you say they were already arriving?"

she didn't reply right away, perhaps unsure of what to say. "i mean, yes, but it would be you they would expect to be greeted by."

i take one a sweater off of its hanger, deciding to wear it. it's thick, and since it is getting close to winter season here, anything that isn't thick and long sleeved is simply qualified as a bad decision. "then, let's go meet their expectations, bexley." i say, turning around, pulling on the sweater as i make my way towards her. at first, she seems confused, stunned that she's 'convinced me' but soon, she follows besides me down the hall without another word.

upon learning that my kingdom is only a part of a four part kingdom, i didn't feel at ease like the others did. especially, when we received letters from each of them, announcing that they would be sending their eldest princes to visit us, we all had vividly different reactions. 

bexley was delighted, only occupied with the idea of handsome princes roaming around and falling madly in love with her. 

"we'll need new clothes," bexley had said the day after the announcement, in deep thought. "i'll have naeira make some for each of us, but she'll need our measurements." 

i had kept some of the staff from the previous castle, but most had been let go. i wanted a fresh start, and if even the council and nobels had turned out to be against me, how could i trust any others? it was simple logic in my mind, while bexley and the others had seen it as slightly extreme. luckily, i was the one in charge, and therefore, ninety percent of our staff now, was entirely new, having applied on their own accord to their positions. even after having removed the lettering system, which most seemed happy but skeptical about, i had no control over the marks on our necks. those were biological and still provided us with a general idea of what we would work best with, which i'm not even sure i would remove if i could. 

"why would we need new clothes? you have a closet full of that already," i had replied. 

"but those aren't new! maire, these are princes. princes!" 

"technically, you are a princess," i had said. "at the very least, one of my ladies," i had been going through some paperwork during our conversation, and i remember not looking up at her before a squeal suddenly cut through the air. i looked up just in time to see her jumping in her seat, before standing up with a wide smile. 

"a princess?" she squealed again, spinning around and making her long dress fan out shortly. "but i was just a servant before. moving through the ranks is unheard of," 

i shrugged. "the rules have changed, bexley. if you want to go after one of them, you have my blessing, on the condition that you move to his kingdom once you fall madly in love," i had said it with little to no amusement in my voice, focusing back onto my papers. bexley could chase them all if she pleased, as long as it didn't result in any of them staying longer than necessary, i didn't mind it. clearly, she had decided to focus on another sentence of mine. i didn't even have to look up to pair the sigh that sounded with an eye-roll as she flopped back down in her seat. 

"aren't you at least the slighest bit curious on how they are?" she asked. "maire, they are princes. princes are dreamy. that's just how it works," 

i glanced up towards her with a raised eyebrow. "in fairytales, bexley. do you live in one?" this time, she rolls her eyes right in front of me. 

"maire, come on. i know you live in a world where everything is black and white, but please, just play along." she says. "for me," and suddenly, her eyes are soft, rounder than normally and i shake my head, knowing exactly what she is trying to do. soften me up so i'll say yes. and even though, i knew exactly what she was doing, i still said it.

"i saw one of them before coming up to get you," bexley whispers in my ear as we pass the last door before the entrance hall. "dreamy, just as i said." 

this time, i roll my own eyes. "you live in fairytales. perhaps, we should have one of the physicians check you out," 

she pinches my side, and i crack a smile before she links out arms, pulling me alongside her as we enter the entrance hall. once our footsteps begin echoing down the hall as we approach them all, they all turn around to greet us. and just as bexley said, upon seeing their faces, they are just as dreamy as she had made them out to be, if not more so. 

never would i ever admit that to her, but feeling how she squeezes my arm, a wide satisfied smile on her face, i get the feeling that i don't even need to.