What I Didn't See - Ao'nung X Fem Reader

Chapter 10 - The Episode

The training was just like all the others.

A few minutes of signing, and a few minutes of breathing before heading into the water.

The 3 teens tested us on our signing skills by signing to us something they wanted us to find underwater. We all did quite well at this.

Once we had completed this we left the water for lunch.

Afterwards, Tsireya took Kiri, Tuk and me to a dock where many other women were sitting. They were breaking apart some clams, separating the shells from the meat inside.

Others were getting ready to dive and we were to join them. Ronal was at the head of the group, attaching a pouch to her waist and handing out a few others to the woman around her, smiling at the women as she did.

Tsireya led us to her mother and grabbed 4 pouches, handing us one each, keeping one for herself.

“We dive Ronal shouted, all the women headed to the dock and dived down.

Tsireya led us through the rocky water where swimming around were butterfly-like creatures. Tsireya placed one on Tuk’s back, helping her connect her queue with it before doing the same, signing to us that they would give us breath.

While I helped pick of the clams from the rocks, I saw my twin. Her feet rested on the rocks, she was moving with the fish, her starry freckles flashing as she did so.

I could see Ronal watching her. She could feel the spiritual connection my sister had with the land and the animals.

I always knew that my sister was gifted. Special. Much more than I would ever be.

I could feel the upset feeling raise up in me quickly and I needed to get out of the water soon in case I broke down.

Episodes were what my parents called them. something I had gotten when I felt the lack of Eywa. Often the feeling would come when I saw my sister showing off her connection.

They only came once every few months but when they came, they came. They were strong and painful. The pain I would get in my stomach from the non-stop crying.

In my later years I got better at controlling them. I was able to lightly cry to myself for few minutes instead of having full on panic attacks. I hadn’t had a proper episode for a year or 2.

I swam up as fast as I could, removing the butterfly-like creature before I surfaced. Gasping for air as my head broke through the water. A few coughs escaped my mouth as I swam towards some rocks that sat above the water.

I clambered up the rock, crouching down with my head hung and closing my eyes as I took in deep, shaky breaths.

Luckily I my body was clouded from the views of the other women on the docks.

My mind was clouded with thoughts. Thoughts I tried to replace with the feeling of my heart I had managed to slow. The tears started to flow and the sobs started to come out.

“Hey. Are you alright?”

My head snapped up as my hand pulled my knife from its sheath. I backed away from where the voice had come from.

Ao’nung was standing on the other side of the rock slowly walking up to me with his hands out wide, showing he was not here to hurt me.

He had a very worried look on his face. A worried look that I was able to remember.

“Just breathe. Put the knife away and breathe.”

I dropped the knife and fell to my knees, covering my face from the boy so he could not see me cry. He knelt down next to me repeating the words ‘in and out’.