Twinsized Matress [style angst]

oh my god? they killed k-

As soon as stan thinks there is no hope, kyle coughs, choking, gasping for air. Trembling, stan puts the water bottle on the bed up to Kyle's mouth, pouring some in. He is in so much shock that all he can say is Kyle's name, over and over again. Kyle shakes again, swallowing the water. Stan holds him to his chest for a while, his mind a blur, tears still pouring out of his eyes, untill kyle weakly pushes away from stan, trying to speak.
"Stan." His voice sounds accusing, but stan would rather kyle hate him forever than to be dead. "I'm sorry kyle. I'm sorry.." he sobs again. "You- don't want me to die?" Kyle coughs out, regaining his conciousness. "You? Kyle, i I couldn't live a minute on this planet without you on it.. youre all i have.. i couldn't hate you, and i never did.." stan starts to ramble, his words slurring into even more tears. After stan regains himself, he sits infront of kyle.

"Kyle, whatever you did.. please don't. I need you... i always need you. I've always needed you so much.. don't let yourself go kyle... you're the the most awesome person that has ever lived. And I'm just... im so sorry that i couldnt.. i couldnt- just let you be that way, that i had to fuck this all up..." stan gives kyle his shirt.

"Kyle broflovski, you are my best friend in the whole world. "

Kyle, confused, hurt, and weak, smiles at stan.
"Stan, you suck." 
"I know."
Kyle gets up, wobbling a little at first. "Im gonna  throw up." He leaves for the bathroom, walking slow. Stan starts biting his nails, then crying again, then tidying kyle's room. He paces, trying to think clearly. He starts to check Kyle's hiding spots for anything.. anything.. something that could explain kyle's story better.. he checks every one, including the mattress. He lifts it up, spotting Kyle's notebook and grabbing it.

He reads every page. His eyes fill with tears as every part of stan's life that led them to this moment is explained in detail- details that make his heart sink in understanding that he is immensley at fault.  He reads, untill the words in Kyle's book turn from angry ones to kind ones, but it still stayed about stan. He reads the last page, his heart shattering with every word he reads, his head spinning, feeling like everyone is watching him, millions of eyes, as he learns the truth. That kyle doesnt just forgive him, he loves him. And he understands him.  Kyle walks in, his legs shaking, holding a bowl of fruit. He sees stan holding the page that kyle poured his heart into, tears falling on it as he wrote. He sees stan, whose tears are falling on the page with just as much feeling as Kyle's did.
"Stan?.. im sorry you had to see that." "You... you arent angry at me? For who i became?" Stan starts. "You think... you really think all that stuff about me, kyle..?" Kyles face turns red hot, shame and guilt taking over him. "Im sorry stan."
Stan looks up at kyle. "Dont apologize for being so... loving. You love me? Kyle? You said you loved me, kyle.. did you mean that?" Stan holds up the paper, looking at kyle with desperation. Kyle sighs, wishing the floor would cave in on him then and there. "Yes stan. I do. So what? Call me disgusting, call me a freak- i do."

Stan pauses, his heart feeling broken by Kyle's sadness but whole by his love for him. "Kyle.." Kyle runs off into the bathroom again, locking the door behind him. Stan runs to the door, pleading.
"Kyle. I need to tell you something.. ..

It's always you, kyle... you were always the one holding my hair back when i drank a bunch and had to puke, it was you who saved my ass everytime we got caught doing something stupid, it was you who let me spend the night when i was fighting with my dad, it was you who would laugh at the jokes i made harder than anyone else.. i knew you loved me. And i  just... want to thank you, so much...kyle, for loving me,
Because no one else did..
And because i love you too."
Kyle listens, trying not to cry. He opens the door, standing in front of stan, just a bit taller than him. He inspects stan's face, and kisses his lips, not letting go untill they both feel safe enough in knowing that neither of them will ever leave again. "Kyle?"
"Yes, stan?" They stand facing eachother in front of Kyle's bathroom, staring at eachother's faces, which are painted in sadness from the war they started between eachother and won together.
"Do you want some oreos?" He asks, tears running down his face again. Kyle nods, and they laugh together, holding each other close.

"Yeah."

DONT WORRY GUYS I WASNT GONNA KILL THE GINGE