Konosuba: A Tale of Four Bizarre Members || Kazuma x Darkness

Prolouge

At dawn, the sun rises, gifting life to all in this world. Merrily, birds chirp, adorning the blue sky as friendly clouds drift by, offering their constant support.

It is a world of profound peace, where nothing could ruin this-

"HEY! WHO ATE MY LEFT OVER MEDIUM-RARE TOAD STEAK SANDWICH!" I was wondering why my day was going so well until this unfortunate predicament hit me like a bolt from the blue. I had woken up with no headache, and there was nothing to bother me until I eagerly opened the prototype fridge—a mere wooden box ensconced in ice. To my dismay, I discovered my beloved leftovers were nowhere to be found, reduced to mere atoms, as if they had vanished into thin air.

"Oh it was me. I got hungry in the middle of the night. I thought that it wouldn't be too bad if I ate Kazuma's food. Be grateful that your steak was a goddess's meal!" The blue-haired goddess peeks her head out from the couch, where she had been lying down and playing video games.

Curse her and her godhood! Dammit, I was too full to finish last night's dinner. Hoping to enjoy a peaceful morning, I had planned to savor the remaining meal before chaos inevitably unfolds in the mansion.

Besides, it wasn't even my cooking; it was that crusader whose cooking skill level is average and plain. However, strangely enough, she makes good tea.

"Wait, Megumin, that's cheating! I was talking to Kazuma! Cheater! Cheater! Your sins won't be forgiven! I have one life left!"

"Aqua, you shouldn't have let your guard down. You should know by now that I show no mercy as I am also on my last life."

Both Megumin and Aqua were engrossed in playing a 2D fighting game featuring stick figures. The twist in the game was the random spawning of weapons scattered all over the map. Their objective was to utilize these weapons to eliminate each other and emerge victorious.

"Oi."

"Look! A golden gun! That has to be a one-shot move!"

"W-Wait! Let me find a weapon as well! I ran out of ninja-stars to throw at you!"

"Oi."

"The game must've realized my true power and identity as the most powerful Crimson Demon, therefore it gifted me one of their best weapons! Take this!"

"Waah! Waah!"

"Oi...!"

"Stop dodging, Aqua. I have only one more bullet! I'll give you a quick and painless death!"

"Never! I'm gonna win and- Wait, who is this guy? Player 3 has joined the game?"

An anonymous player joins the match and decided to go for one of the weakest weapon in the game.

A stick.

"Uwah! Help, Aqua! Player 3 is too strong! How is he beating me with a stick! If only I had my explosion ingame!"

"I'm trying! I'm trying! He's too fast! Ah, look I found a whip! I'm gonna whip this guy until he submits to my superior skills!"

In less than 10 seconds, Player 3 decimates both Player 1 and Player 2 quickly and effortlessly. Both Aqua and Megumin turn to me with jealousy and anger written all over their face.

"Now that I have your attention." I stood up. "Give me my precious food back!" I berated her.

"Too bad! If you want it back, call me Aqua-sama and pray to me 3 times a day for a whole month and I'll reconsider." She gives a pouty expression, closing her eyes and turning her head away to go back to playing the game.

The food would have been digested by now! It probably already has. But Goddesses don't use the bathroom, strangely enough.

"The food would've been digested by now. Though I wonder if Aqua is secretly a Crimson Demon like me since she also doesn't use the bathroom. That would explain why she is almost to my level of power!"