Forbidden Things

Chapter thirty five

-Tate- 

She wants to do this with me, and I want to do this with her too. I know I've always said I would never do this, but once you've grown up with it you slowly start to see it as normal. And I could use a little normal right now.

I know myself that it is far from normal, but it is currently the only future perspective that contains certainty for me. I always wanted to continue with football, and I also know that I am good enough for it, but the chance that I will succeed is still very small.

Taking over the security of my father's job gives me a sense of security. I know my father will protect me completely in everything I do, and I know Callie does too.

It's not my first choice, but it's the best choice.

I'm driving home. My father wants to start tomorrow. I don't quite know what this training entails, but I'm afraid it can't do much good.

When I get home I immediately go upstairs because I'm so tired. My head is still busy with what will happen tomorrow, but I soon fall asleep anyway.

. . .

"Baby wake up." I open my eyes and I see my father sitting on the edge of the bed. "Get ready and be downstairs in 5 minutes." He stands up and I hear him walking down the stairs.

I walk tiredly to the bathroom. I look at the clock and see that it's 5:30 in the morning. I splash some water on my face and brush my teeth. I put my long hair in a ponytail, put on some clothes and go downstairs.

When I come down I am shocked by what I see. I see a man tied to a chair in the middle of our living room. He's completely covered in blood.

"What is this Dad?" I ask him as I can see the fear in the man's eyes.

"The main lesson of my work is that you absolutely must not feel sorry for the enemy. Those people are bad, they do bad things and they have to pay for it."

I look at my father confused because I don't quite understand what this is about.

"This man is an accomplice of the family who is at this moment starting a war with us. He's done bad things. And now he's going to pay for that." My father says. He walks towards the kitchen, opens a drawer and takes out a gun.

"Dad what are you doing?"

He walks over to me and thrusts the gun into my hand. I've never held a gun before, I look at my dad because I still think he's joking.

"Shoot him."

My father looks at me seriously. He's joking right? I've never done anything like this before and now he expects me to just do it?

"Dad I can't."

"This is the first step sweetie, if you don't have this in you you can't go through."

"Does Callie have to do this too?"

"Me and Mr. Grey have discussed the approach together, and we expect the same from you both."

I don't understand how he acts like this is the most normal thing in the world. You can't just kill someone. I don't have that in me.

"He killed a lot of innocent people Tate, now it's his turn."

I look at the man again and I see guilt in his eyes. He probably really regrets his actions. Maybe he didn't really want to do this either, but was forced to.

"Don't look him in the eye Tate, it will only make it harder."

I can't, I'm doubting right now if I should have. I knew that my father did such things, but to see it in reality is different.