Forbidden Things

Chapter thirty one

-Tate- 

"Go sit down Tate."

I walk over to the chair across from him and sit down. "What do you want to talk about coach?" I already know exactly what he's going to say.

"What's the matter with you Tate?" he says, crossing his arms in front of him on his desk. I also know that it was clear that I was not doing my best during this training.

"I guess I just didn't get enough sleep last night." I say as I lean back in my chair. I'm just not focused. I feel more ghost than human if I have to be honest. I only half present because part of me is stuck. I can't let go of what happened at the party.

I feel like me and Callie were finally going somewhere. That it was no longer constant denial and avoidance. I felt like it was real this time. At least that's how it felt to me.

She hasn't replied to anything. I've called her 1000 times, but I just don't get a response. It seems as if she no longer exists. And for her I no longer exist. Her ego is too big to just look at me.

I'm still in love with her. I know that about myself. But right now it's not the love feelings that tell me, but the pain. The pain I'm in right now because I'm scared. Afraid I won't get her back.

"I think something else is going on Tate."

Of course something else is going on. I didn't sleep last night but that's not the reason I'm in this state right now. She is.

"Tate I know your heart is feeling something right now, your brain is thinking something right now, only you are trying to hide it. Look, I get that you don't want to talk to me about what's going on, but Friday is an important game, and we need the old Tate. Can you try to talk to someone about it?"

"Sure i will, can i go now?" I don't like that he can see right through me. I want to get out of here as soon as possible. I pick up my bag from the floor and walk out of the office towards the school.

"Hey what was that about?" I hear someone say behind me.

I turn to see Madison standing with a curious look on her face.

"He wanted to know if I was fit for Friday's game."

"Well are you?"

I look at her confused. "Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Tate you look exausted."

Is it really that clear?

"I didn't get enough sleep last night."

I walk into history class. I see that Callie is already inside with Brooke. They also seemed quite close in training. I don't know since when that has been going on.

I walk in and take a seat at the table a few spots behind Callie. She doesn't even notice I've come in, all her attention is on Brooke.

What the hell does Brooke want from her? Callie never opens up to people, so what does Brooke have that's so special?

mr. Jones enters the classroom. Everyone continues to talk. I catch myself staring at Callie and Brooke.

"Ms. Grey, have you read the book?" he asks Callie to start the lesson.

"yeah i did." she responds to him. Everyone in the class is silent because Mr. Jones wants to discuss the book.

"What do you think of the main character?" he asks her.

''I think the main character should think about things better.'' She responds to his question.

"Why is that?"