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Soobin's POV

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Soobin's POV

"Soobin please, can we just talk," Yeonjun called knocking on my door.

Let's just say things didn't go as planned.

"Wha- what??" I asked.

"Be my boyfriend," he repeated.

"I-" I stood up, this is what I wanted right? But why do, why do I feel rushed? It feels wrong, weird, different. "I'm sorry Jun..." I mumbled as I ran off to my room.

"Soobin!" He called. But I was already gone.

I locked the door and went to my bed. "What the fuck did I just do...."

"Please go away Hyung," I said back.

"Soobin I'm sorry about yesterday ok, but don't ignore me today too." He begs.

"Yeonjun please," I repeat.

Yeonjun sighs from the other side. But I know he doesn't move; I know he's still there. "Please," I say one last time.

"I'm not moving," he says. I hear him sit down. He meant it; he wasn't going to move from there. Should I just let him in, what would I say? How would I approach him...

I can't just go up to him without knowing what to say.
Oh hey Jun, remember yesterday? My bad cause I've been secretly in love with you for around 2 years. Whoopsies.
I CANT SAY THAT.

Oh god oh god... What do I do?

"Fine fine!" I yelled, "Just- just give me a minute.

"Really? You mean it..." his voice starts hopeful but dies down.

"Y- yea," I confirm.

Ok Soobin, breathe. You got this. Just... Tell him the truth, not too hard. Right?

Fuck! I can't do this. He probably changed his mind now... Why would he want me as a boyfriend, I probably broke his heart. He probably made a mistake, surely he didn't mean it. He couldn't have.

Gosh, stop overthinking Soobin!
I slapped myself trying to get these thoughts out of my head.

"Soobin? Is everything ok," Yeomjun asked worryingly.

Ow... I definitely hit myself too hard.

"I'm fine no need to worry," I say.

Alr then, here goes nothing. Only live once they say.

I went to the door and unlocked it. I took a deep breath before placing my hand on the doorknob and twisting it. I opened the door my eyes glued to the ground. I can't look at him...

"Soobin..." Yeonjun mumbled.

"I'm sorry," I apologize.

"No no, you have nothing to be sorry for. I should be sorry for saying something stupid like that. It was dumb I know, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. I just thought... Cause we kiss." he trailed off his tone was panicked and he almost sounded like he was going to cry.

"Jun," I said.

"Can we just forget about it, I mean I don't wanna ruin us, our friendship. I'm sorry I brought it up I know, I know. It's dumb..."

"Jun," I spoke a little louder.

"I'm rambling sorry, look the point is you're my friend and I don't wanna ruin anything between us-"

"Yeonjun!" I yelled. "You don't have to apologize or go on about how you made a mistake," I reassured.

I took a deep breath. I grabbed his hand and pulled him into the room. I closed the door and locked it then went over to my bed. Yeonjun followed and sat next to me.

"Listen, I was the one in the wrong ok-"

"No no, I was I shouldn't have ask-"

"Jun!" I yelled. "Seriously listen to me please," I plead.

He nodded his head and shifted his body to face me.

"I was wrong ok, I just didn't know how to react. You're right, we kissed and you thought it meant something. And- and I thought that too, I swear I did. I just- I didn't expect you to ask me that. And I freaked," Now it was my turn to start rambling. "The truth is, Hyung I've liked you for more than a year now. I'm too much of a coward to admit it. And I'm scared, what if someone finds out? If we're hated by our fans if it gets leaked."

"But I want it to work because I don't just like you Hyung. I've fallen for you, hard. I've fallen in love with you. And I'm sorry if you find it weird or uncomfortable but it's the truth and I wanna tell you only the truth starting from today," I confess.

"I'll start with this. That one day you woke me up in my room when you thought I had a fever, you made me soup and took care of me. It wasn't a fever I was just blushing, I was blushing because I dreamt about kissing you, and the fact that you woke me up made me blu-" I was cut off as I felt a familiar pair of lips connect to mine.

My eyes widened as I saw Yeonjun had pulled me into a kiss. I closed them and quickly kissed back. Something about the way he kisses me makes me feel euphoric. I loved the feeling. The way his lips moved against mine, the hand placement around my waist and neck, and the way he'd taken control made me submit to him.

I guess it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

He pulled away his face still a couple inches away. "Let's try this again then," he whispers.

"Choi Soobin," He used my full name. "Will you accept me as your boyfriend? Even if we need to keep it a secret from the world," He asks.

I smile at him brightly and nod my head, "Yes Yeonjun, I'd be glad to take you as my boyfriend. Only if you can accept me as yours."

"Of course, I would Bin," he chuckled leaning in to kiss my nose.

I giggled and he giggled back. I wasn't sure why we were laughing but it was comforting. I finally got what I wanted. I felt happy but slightly guilty. Can I still be a good leader this way? Can we keep it a secret?

I shook off the thoughts. Stay positive Bin. Even if the worst things happen at least Yeonjun will be by my side.

I pulled him into a hug snuggling my head into his chest. He laughed a little more hugging me back. "What now?" I ask.

"We could make out?" Yeonjun suggests smirking down at me.

I giggled and nodded my head eagerly.

He brought his hands to my waist and pulled me in closer connecting our lips once again; I threw my hand around his neck caressing his hair as I kissed him passionately.

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