ᴊᴀᴅᴇ ɪꜱ ᴀ ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ \\ ᴠɪᴄᴛᴏʀɪᴏᴜꜱ

ᴅʀᴀᴄᴏɴɪᴀɴ ᴠᴀᴍᴘ

"Knock knock," Jade said.

"Ah, my favourite gank. What brings you here?" Sikowitz asked, a bunny in his arms.

Jade glanced at the bunny. She was dying to pet the adorable thing, but she told herself she had to focus. Putting on the nicest smile she could muster, Jade walked over to him and handed him a coconut with a plastic straw poking out from it.

"And what exactly is this?" Sikowitz peered into the coconut as if Jade had given him a poison drink.

"It's coconut milk. The very best Hollywood has to offer. In fact, it's been fermented for eleven years."

Sikowitz wriggled his eyebrows. "And you're bringing me this because...?"

"Oh, I was just wondering if you could put me in a group with Beck, Cat and Andre in class this afternoon?" Jade smiled cheerily. "Oh, and that new Vega chick, too," she added, as if it had merely been an afterthought.

❦

"You know Cat," Jade said casually as she walked to class with Cat. "One time I saw a dog in the park. It was scratching itself crazy. Turns out it had a really bad case of lice."

Cat gasped. "One time my brother had lice. He tried to use them as cake topping."

❦

Sikowitz had just finished explaining the rules for the acting exercise.

"Come up to the stage, Andre, Beck, Cat, Tori," he said. "And Jade," Sikowitz winked.

Jade hid her smirk as she headed to the stage. Cast. Setting. Situation. It was all as planned. Now all she had to do was find the perfect moment to drop the d-bomb.

As if on cue, Vega scratched her head.

"Oh no! Our new dog has lice!" Cat exclaimed.

"I know just what to do!" Jade grinned. She stalked towards a shrugger and swiped the cup of coffee he was holding.

Jade ignored the warning look from Beck as she poured the coffee straight onto Vega's head.

Vega stood, dripping and furious.

Jade merely smiled and said, "What's the prob, dog?"