Loki oneshots

Batte of the Attention Whores (WandaNat)

A/N Loki is also not in this one, and it is also a birthday fic for my friend caitlynsnow-yayyy on tumblr/ChocolateXMyMouth on ao3 who you should still check out on both this sites and also this is a WandaNat fic and also don't question the timeline mkay 

Tony Stark is a strange man.

It stands to reason, then, that his parties would be strange, too.

And that – Natasha would assume, at least – is why the theme for tonight's party is essentially being an attention whore. There's even a contest later, for those who dare enter it, where the person who's deemed the biggest attention whore of the night wins ten thousand dollars – with that same amount matched to a charity of their choice, because Tony may be a strange man, but at least he's a kind strange man.

Natasha can already tell she's not going to win this. Her idea of drawing attention to herself was a long dress with a low neckline and a thigh-high slit up the leg. She even threw on her beloved tap shoes for some extra pizazz (and some extra noise).

Meanwhile, Peter Parker is hanging from the ceiling in a neon Spider-Man costume, and Pietro is dressed in what appears to be a giant homemade cardboard Christmas tree costume with a boombox blasting Mariah Carey in the middle of summer.

It seems that Natasha is simply not strange enough for this.

She makes her way over to the bar, where she pours her own drink and takes a seat. People-watching at Tony's parties is always fun, but tonight takes it to a whole new level. The things some of these people came up with are nothing short of fascinating. Perhaps more fascinating, though, is that Tony himself is just wearing jeans and a Metallica t-shirt.

He really is a strange, strange man.

Natasha spots a familiar face from across the room, and she raises up a hand to get her attention, waving her over. Wanda smiles and obliges, just as Natasha knew she would. What's the fun of this party if there's no one to laugh at everyone's outfits with?

"Hey!" Wanda greets her with a grin.

"Hey yourself," Natasha replies, pressing a quick kiss to her cheek. "Well, don't you look stunning?"

Wanda looks down at her outfit, a slight blush spreading across her cheeks. "Do you think it was too much?"

Natasha snorts. "Your brother is literally dressed like a Christmas tree, and you think a ballgown is too much?"

Wanda gently brushes out her long, flowy, tulle-filled skirt. It could just be a trick of the light, but Natasha is pretty sure she sees it glitter faintly as it moves. She has to admit, if there's even been a time to wear a red, glittery ballgown, this is probably it.

"You know," Natasha says, "I don't know what bra you're wearing, but your boobs look great."

Wanda giggles at that. "I think it's just the dress."

"I think it's just 'cause you've got good boobs," Natasha counters, a playful smirk on her face.

Again, Wanda giggles, her cheeks turning a faint shade of red.

"I think I have you beat, though," Natasha tells her.

Wanda scoffs. "Excuse me?"

"I think I tried harder with the whole 'pay attention to me' thing," Natasha says (mostly) jokingly.

"You're wearing the same kind of thing you always wear!" Wanda says defensively. "I've seen you wear this before! I got a whole new dress for this!"