Acquired Tastes

Chapter Seventeen

Exhausted as he was, there was not enough time for Neil to sleep before the day's first run, so he spent the bit of time that he did have stretching, hoping to wake his body back up. He and Roman walked down to the track together in the early morning light, everything feeling slightly off in that post-all-nighter way, but some part of Neil felt a little lighter.

Even though they placed well, a tidal wave of exhaustion washed over Neil as soon as he'd finished his final lap, and he sank down onto the ground, his body begging him to let it fall asleep right there, on the cool rubber of the track. Roman toed him in the shoulder, grinning down at him. "Whatcha doing?"

Neil groaned. "Dying."

Roman smirked and held out his hand. "Come on, let's get coffee."

It took a few moments for Neil to find the energy to reach up, take Roman's hand, and let him pull him to his feet.

"How do you have so much energy?"

"Cocaine," Roman replied, pulling his pack of cigarettes out of his back pocket. He didn't continue until he'd lit one and put the rest away. "No, I'm just vibing," he said, taking it out from between his lips and exhaling slowly. "I had a good time last night."

Neil hated the way his cheeks grew warm, the way his entire body felt a little bit lighter when Roman said that, and he felt desperate to change the subject. "How are your lungs not completely fucked?" He asked. "You smoke like a pack a day."

"I do not," Roman said, glaring at him. "And I don't think now's the time to quit, anyway."

"You think you're gonna be less stressed in the future?"

Roman eyed him, blowing a cloud of smoke at him before answering. "Can you imagine how much you'd hate me if I was going through withdrawal in the middle of all this?"

Neil shrugged, eyes on the steps as they walked up the small hill to the quad. "Shit, my bad, sorry for not wanting you to die."

Roman chuckled spitefully, flicking the ash off the end of his cigarette. "I'd love to live long enough to die from smoking. Don't think I'd complain. Besides, you smoke too."

Neil rolled his eyes. "Only when I'm with you. And anyway, all I'm saying is-"

"Stop it, Neil, it's not your job to fuckin fix me. Get out of my business." Roman stuck the cigarette back between his lips, giving Neil a sidelong glance. "I didn't mean for it to come out like that. I just mean...it's been a lot, with everything. Can we talk about something else?"

Neil nodded, but neither of them spoke for a long time as they made their way down the sidewalk, toward the dining hall. Inside, they each got coffee, and Neil filled a plate with a bit of just about everything, then walked over and dropped onto a chair across from Roman. He took several gulps of the shitty coffee, then set it down on the table and shoved his plate to the middle. "What do you want?"

Roman ran his thumb around the rim of his mug. "I'm not really that hungry."

"That's not what I asked."

Roman eyed him for several seconds, eyes narrowing. "Neil, I literally just told you-"

"Stop," Neil said. "It's not like that. As your partner, I just don't want to lose our fight later because you haven't slept or eaten anything all day."

They engaged in a staring contest, and Neil found himself gazing into that unblinking, contemptuous green: like forests he'd like to decompose in. Roman stared back, eyebrows lowered, mouth set in a thin, determined line. Nothing moved. Finally, Roman's eyes dropped to the food between them. He studied it for several seconds before taking the apple off the plate and taking a bite. Neil had to fight to keep a grin from spreading across his face as he reached out and pulled the plate back over. This was a fight he hadn't expected to win, and even though he knew that an apple itself meant pretty much nothing, he'd discovered that he could tell Roman to eat and Roman would do it, at least today, at least this time, and the feeling was absolutely euphoric. Neil wanted to change the subject, to take Roman's focus off what had just happened, afraid that too much thought would lead to Roman changing his mind, but it took him several seconds to come up with something to say.