TOUCH

Forty Eight

She walked into her house with dry tears in her eyes. She didn't care to acknowledge Patricia, the lady who was tending to the small garden by her porch, when she asked her what was wrong.

She went straight upstairs to her parents bedroom. She barged in, making Lisa turn to her, a phone by her ear and her face shocked.

"Nevermind Daniel, I found her." she said into the phone, and then pulled it away from her ear. She studied her daughter, unrecognizable clothes on her body, and her eyes red and puffy. Her eyebrows furrowed in concern. "Baby, are you okay? What happened-"

"I'm gay." Jordan blurted out.

Lisa's eyes went wide from shock. Her expression again softened when she saw the look of fear in Jordan's eyes. She opened her arms, gasping as Jordan ran into her arms and squeezed her.

"I know baby. I've always known." she reassured, kissing the girls forehead.

Her hands rubbed Jordan's back in comfort as she squeezed her back. Jordan felt safe, and warm and accepted. Like there was nothing to hide, and like she'd been hiding for no reason all this time.

More tears escaped her eyes as her chest constricted. Lisa, upon hearing the silent sobs, embraced her tighter.

"I'm sorry." Jordan mumbled.

Lisa didn't ask what for. She knew already. She was apologizing for the fiasco with Liya, that had led Jordan to exclaim that Lisa wasn't her mother, leaving her in tears. But an apology was not what she wanted from her.

"Never apologize for saying how you feel just because it won't satisfy me-"

She pulled away, shaking her head. "It's not how I feel."

"Then how do you feel?" Lisa asked.

Jordan paused. For once she wouldn't ignore the question. For once, she would answer. She would tell her everything, from the deepest to the most shallow. She wouldn't silence herself anymore. Atleast not from Lisa. Lisa should be an exception.

"I saw Terry today." she admitted.

Lisa clears her throat, nodding. She felt a little awkward talking to Jordan about her birth mother.

It's not to say she didn't like Terry. She just didn't like the stories she's heard about her. Stories from Daniel, talking about how manipulative and controlling the woman was. Saying how Terry forced him to leave, yet after he did, she told him what useless of a man he was for leaving his children. Stories about how financially abusive Terry was, demanding money from him, claiming it was for the kids. Until eventually he made the decision to cut ties with Terry, and take his daughters with him. And after that, stories she's heard from Maya about hers and Jordan's childhood.

Regardless, she was Jordan's mother. And she couldn't stop Jordan from loving her mother.

"Honestly, I thought you would have  done that a long time ago." she said. "How did it go?"

Jordan hesitated, looking down at the floor to restrain the tears.

"She's happy." She said, her tone not sounding pleased by this revelation. "How could she be happy without me? Without Maya?"

"She knows you're safe and well taken care of. As a mother, I understand that sometimes, you just want your children to be okay. Even if it's not with you." Lisa tried to console.

"You'd be happy if I left?" Jordan asked.

Lisa opened her mouth to speak, closing it again. Of course she wouldn't be. What kind of a sick being would be glad to see their child leave. She held a certain kind of resentment for Terry because of this revelation, honestly. She couldn't atleast pretend to be upset for Jordan's sake.