The Story of Alice Jones

Chapter 10-The Grave

That night when me and the guys came back from kissing bridge we headed to our separate rooms to sleep. But no matter how hard I tried I couldn't sleep. My dangerous thoughts were keeping me awake. A multitude of thoughts were racing through my head through the night. After a while I decided to do something instead of just laying in my bed. I quietly sat up in the cold sheets and put on my ugg slippers as I made my way out of the bedroom and walked into the kitchen. I slowly reached into the wooden cupboard and grabbed a glass. I put it under the sink tap and turned the water on cold. As it filled the glass about halfway I turned the faucet off and looked around the room. As I turned around behind me I saw an old wooden door. I could only assume it led to the basement. I tiptoed over to the door and turned the knob but it wouldn't move. I sighed and looked around the kitchen. I started to quickly look through the drawers and found a pack of paper clips. I opened them and took one out. I stretched it out and stuck it in the door knob. I jiggled it into the knob until I heard a click, I turned the knob and it slowly creaked open. I looked over to the light switch and flicked it on. Nothing had changed in the dark stairwell. I flicked it on and off a few times before giving up.

"Dammit." I whispered as I looked back into the kitchen. I opened up the small closet door and grabbed a flashlight. I switched it on and made my way down the unstable steps. As I reached the bottom I scanned the room using the flashlight, as suspected by the smell all I saw was boxes covered in dust. I took a deep sigh and started looking at the labels. The only one that caught my eye was labeled "Dad". I grabbed the box and set it on the ground. I dusted it off and sat down. I was shuffling through the papers until I reached the bottom of the box and found a large photo album with a picture of all of us as a family. I moved it onto the concrete floor and started flipping through the pages. It was my dads whole fatherhood in a book shown by pictures. As I flipped through the pages all the memories came flooding back to me. All the times he chased me outside in the hot July sun with water balloons, all the movie nights we had, all the times me and him cuddled in my bed late at night because I had a bad dream. As I continued to go through the photo album I felt tears falling from my face and witnessed the drops falling onto the laminated pictures. I wiped the tears away and just stared at the brick wall in front of me. I took a deep breath, thinking that I should go to bed. I put the photo album back in the box and returned it to its dark corner. I made my way back up the stairs and shut the door, I didn't even bother to lock it back up. I tiptoed my way back to my room and got into bed. I covered myself up with the soft comforter and let sleep take over me. In my sleep I controlled reality, in my dreams my dad was still alive, my brother and sister were kind, in my dreams we were a happy family.

I woke up that morning to the sound of birds and the warm sun hitting my face. I opened my eyes and saw a cardinal in the tree closest to the window, looking at me for a good while and then flying away. I smiled sadly and sat up. I picked out my outfit for the day. I chose a metallica t-shirt from one of their album covers, ripped skinny black jeans that fit me just perfectly and decorated it with a belt. I tied on my black combat boots and put on my favorite beanie with all sorts of pins attached. I walked out of the bedroom that I had claimed as mine and walked into the kitchen. Belch was in the kitchen having a cup of coffee, the others were nowhere in sight.

"Where is everyone?" I spoke up, Belch turned to me and set the mug down.

"They went home for a while, should be back soon, I'm sure." Belch said as he looked out the window that showcased the backyard area.

"Oh okay...I was wondering if it was okay if...you take me to the cemetery...it won't be too long I promise...I just want to see my fathers grave is all." I explained as I began to fidget with my thumbs.

"Yea sure, I don't see why not. I'll get the car started." Belch said as he put his coffee cup in the sink and grabbed his keys. As he passed me I followed in pursuit. He unlocked the blue pontiac and got into the driver seat. I quickly got into the passenger seat and put on my seatbelt before he started driving to the cemetery. When we arrived I showed Belch the closest parking lot to my fathers grave. As soon as he put the vehicle in park I hopped out and walked through the cemetery. I looked down as I passed all the surrounding graves, some so old that you can't even read the names. As I continued to walk I saw my fathers name on his grave. I rushed to it and just stared at his name and the small description above it. Always loved, never forgotten. Loved son, brother, husband, and father. I dropped down on my knees as I started to feel tears well up in my eyes. I took a deep shaky breath and closed my eyes tightly.

"How did he die? If you don't mind me asking." Belch said as he sat down next to me as he started to light his cigarette.

"He killed himself...me and my siblings were at school...and we just saw him hanging in the living room...no note no nothing. Just his cold, lifeless, body...his eyes were still open so it was like the devil was just staring at us..." I explained as I wiped the tears from my eyes. Belch looked at me and offered me his cigarette. I took it and put it in my mouth, taking long deep breaths.

"I'm sorry...'bout your dad. You shouldn't have had to go through that." Belch said as he took the cigarette back and finished it off before putting it out in the grass.

"It's fine...there's nothing you can do about it." I said as I just stared at the grave once again. I wondered how things would be different if my father had not taken away his life. I wonder if we would still be that happy family everyone saw us as. Would I continue to be happy or would I end up depressed like I am today? Would Harry and CJ be drunks like they are today? The possibilities are endless and I'm not sure which outcome I wish to believe in the most.