Heeriye

Thirty Two.

Shehnaaz

The kids have just gone down to the gardens with Ayushi when I notice the message on my lockscreen.

Sidharth:Be outside in 5 minutes.

It was sent three minutes ago. Which means I have two minutes to get my ass outside.

Except why? His message is just as informative as he has been lately and it's making me nervous. Not just because this is the first time in weeks that he's deigned to text me at all; it's also the first contact between us since I word-vomited my confession all over him yesterday. Since then—radio silence.

Until this ominous five-word text.

Is he working off some sort of guidebook I'm not aware of? Intrigue and suspense building: how to bring the drama. Chapter 5 in a Mafia's Guide to Intimidation and World Domination.

His Range Rover is zooming up the drive as I walk down the steps. He whips a full turn and stops just in front of me, inch-perfect. He leans over and pushes the door open. I get in hoping he'll fill me in, but no explanation seems forthcoming as he immediately shifts back into drive and we take off again. I figure he'll explain when he's ready. But after ten minutes, he's as silent as the night. And he looks about as friendly.

"Sidharth?" His eyes flicker in my direction and then back to the road. "Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

I'm halfway between a scared gulp and an annoyed scowl. This is all happening in a week where I'm supposed to be especially mindful of my blood pressure. But I can feel the stress sweats coming on. It always starts at the palms. He turns the corner and I frown. This is my neighborhood. Or at least, it used to be.

"Are you taking me back to the apartment?"

"Yes."

Okay, breathe. Breathe. Remember to stay calm for the baby. Think about your freaking blood pressure!Of course, all that does is make me sweat more. Somehow, I don't think additional sweat will help.

I glance towards Sidharth, who remains uninterested in looking at me. Is it because he's done? He didn't buy my explanation and now, he just wants to get rid of me? He's gonna drop me off with Bhavan and let him finish me off? I'm gonna lose custody of my kids anyway?

What is happening?

Blood pressure!

It's a really fucked-up version of He loves me, he loves me not.

I'm spiraling but I have no idea how to turn my mind off or my heartbeat down. "Sidharth," I say, swallowing hard, "you're making a huge mistake."

"No, I'm not," he replies, completely stone-cold. "I'm fixing one."

Maybe I could open the door and kind of cannonball my way out of this car? I glance towards the speedometer. He's doing a casual eighty. Yeah, that's definitely gonna kill me.

What if I just leap out and run the moment he stops driving? I bite my bottom lip, knowing full well that that would end terribly. I've never been the fastest runner. I joined track because Shruti joined track. After a couple of training sessions, the coach told me that I should consider going out for theater instead.

By the time he parks outside my Hell's Kitchen apartment, I'm no longer surprised. I'm strangely resigned. Maybe it's time to accept my fate. I'm not meant to be the guardian of those kids. It seems the universe is unequivocally opposed to it.

"Come on," Sidharth orders once we're parked.

I don't even try to run. I just slink after him into the building and up to the fourth floor. I can hear Bhavan puttering around in there. My skin crawls at the thought of seeing him again.