Turn

11 - Erin Mathis

I groaned as I sat up from my lying position on the large couch stationed in the middle of Stark's Tower. I was on one of the upper floors, so, naturally the view of the city was great no matter which direction I chose to look at any given point in time.

"Please tell me that was a dream..." I mumbled hopefully, and spitefully to myself, knowing very well it was not, just based on the extraterrestrial presence that I could still feel meandering around in my head.
"A dream, a nightmare. Not reality."

We beg to differ, Cos...a voice inside my head, my voice, echoed back as a response. Although it was undoubtably my voice, I could detect the alien undertones and knew straight away that it wasn't merely my subconscious trying to talk me out of the delusion I wanted to talk myself into.

Cos? What the--

"Morning, Sleeping Beauty," Tony Stark waltzed in with the sound of sliding elevator doors.

"Don't call me that..." I glared.

"Yikes!" Tony feigned a bit of fear--which, to be honest, looked pretty convincing due to the actual fear of what he most likely knew I could do--holding his mouth agape and his hands up in surrender. "I take a girl in for her own good and this is the kind of thanks I get!" His next few sentences are a muttered joke that I couldn't help but roll my eyes at. "Maybe I took in the dragon, instead..."

"Quit the theatrics, Stark." I snapped. Sometimes, I hated people so much that they could have saved my life and I still wouldn't have cracked a grateful smile once in their direction--

Oh, wait...

"Tony," My glare faded, and Tony paused in the middle of the on floor bar/kitchen. He snapped his head in my direction as if he couldn't believe I was talking. The matter of the fact was, he had saved my life. No doubt this alien was crafty and had already evaded SHIELD security once before, but SHIELD and the people who ran it weren't stupid. I was literally, the only person on the heli-carrier--believe it or not--and creeps like...well, whatever I turned into last night don't just turn up randomly.

I paused much longer than I should have...or, even intended to.

"Erin?" Tony spoke my name in the same manner I had spoken his, not but a minute and a half ago, only question and slight concern seeped through the undertones of his voice and I couldn't help but soften up a little when I picked up on them.

"You know...don't you?"

"Know about what?"

"Mr. Rodgers knows, too, doesn't he?"

"Knows about what?"

"Cut the crap, Stark!" I cried, standing up from the couch and throwing the blankets that had been draped over me down on the couch in a frustrated manner. "Steve is the most transparent person I think I have ever met when it comes to suspecting someone of something, and you aren't that great at keeping your schemes under wraps either, so tell me!" I stood facing him, still standing next to the couch. "You knew about me, didn't you?"

"You were the only one left on the ship, Mathis--"

"Oh, all the scenarios that could have raced through your mind!" I flailed my arms in the air, twirling a little as I made my way over to the bar. I was losing it again. I could feel it. "I could have been attacked by the intruder! You couldn't see my face could you?!" My eyes flared that same, almost horrifyingly, opaque blue. Tony flinched. I don't know what he was seeing, but I think I was sending him the images of different scenarios I was thinking up.

"How about this, huh?" Another flash and a flinch.

"Ooh! This one's good!"

"Or, or..."

Flash.

Flinch.

Flash.

"We could have gotten away with it!" I slammed a fist on the bar table, and by this time, Tony was free of mental images. "But we can't help it if she's isn't used to the pressure!"

"Erin..." Tony reached out to place a hand on my arm, but I backed away, my head hanging with eyes plastered to the floor.

"Listen." From that point forward it was all alien talking. There was no me.
"I can't allow her to start blaming herself. Her mind, with me in it, will eradicate itself, and so much damage will happen...so. Much. Damage."

"What are you--Erin?"

"Listen. Too much of any one emotion will override her brain. So much damage."

"Erin, I was trying to keep you safe by keeping you out of SHIELD's medical branch, but this is out of control. You need help--"

"LISTEN!" The alien screeched, smacking both hands into the bar table.
"Pressure, emotion and sound, are my worst enemies. She may have inherited all of my powers, but she has gained all of my weaknesses as well. Either keep my host out of harm's way, or I will have no choice but to terminate her the safe way." There was a long pause. Tony and I were not close, but he did seem to care about how I was 'terminated'.

"The safe way for her...or you?" Tony asked spitefully, resting his glare on me.

"I do what I can to survive. I care not about what happens to my current host as long as there's a way for me to survive." Tony put a hand to his chin in deep, concerned thought.

My memory of those events were erased as quickly as I had gained my consciousness back. My vision was shot for a few seconds and all I could see was black. Pitch black.

I can't say it was horrifying, because it wasn't, but I can say I was horrified.

Horrified of what I would do if I could learn to harness the power of the thing inside my head. Horrified of why I would even consider doing anything about it at all if it didn't concern removing it.

Horrified that I wouldn't want to remove it at all.