Wahaashtini

2》Around my neck

In A Velvet Glove . . .

The winter season comes with the dense fog grasping it's admiration in order that the radiant beauty of its.

The brisk sunrays and soft clouds were scattered in the crayon sky which isn't moving as if rooted in the midst. Lucid daydreams are valueless to be lively in the pastel lifetime. The remorseful dew drops mocks me as I enter the gate. The shimmering coldness of the nature can't slice my heart as it is made of faulty pure gold. The golden rays of it's illuminated the imaan in me. My shivering imaan and silver soul was scared once but now it's unfortunate gold. The molten fog wafts against my faulty skin and makes me among of the piercing sunlight which pierces the cloud to come into the earth.

I walk as I recall again what he said to me a few minutes ago.

"....I wish you knew. I pity you. If you knew you would never want to be in this relationship." His broken shouts pierced in my ear to knock out the air of my frosted lungs. I stop as I find it went solid to make me suffer. I accept it as still the sneering tears rolling down my cheeks." Do you even have a single knowledge about Islam? Do you follow the orders Allah has bestowed upon you? "

" What made you do this to me? Weren't you the one who wanted to keep this up? Who wanted to be with me forever?" I refuse to answer by throwing my questions at him.

The venomous silence cut through my rusted fragile soul which pierced like needles only to sting but to my astonishment it is numbing my body.

"Why you are asking the same question when I already gave it a decent answer. One last thing...Fear Allah. He will give you what you have lost, He will give you inner peace." He turns to leave which make my soul restless. As if the soul in me leaving my body at its worst. I don't want to let go my soul out of my frigid body which turned petrified with terror. " What is yours will find you, do not be sad."

"Why you are talking like a ludicrous religious newbie?" My remorseful voice says without acknowledging its wost tenor.

"The person who can't maintain the relationship with Allah, how will she keep up the relationship with me? " He halts as his legs losses its courage to go forward.

I go dumbfounded. As if my heart lost its gravity. All the while he isn't meeting my gaze. When he used to stare at me non stop even it is how he was yesterday.

"You think islam is boring? It forbids all to refrain a person from enjoying the life, it is anti-romantic, it's ugly and avobe all it's for terrorists? I shall give it a decent answer. I can't sit with this view.-"

"The sounds of your intention doesn't seem decent and avobe all... you broke me." I can feel his conscience stirrs. He closes his eyes only to open again which makes me to raise hopes for a second.

"Islam forbids the thing is harmful for us. Islam isn't ugly, it makes us realise we are one- our Qhibla is one( West direction), our Rabb is one( Allah ), our kaba(the black Kaba) is one, our book is one(Qur'an), our intention is one( To worship none but Allah), our life is one which will enter the hereafter after death." He huffs and says in broken tone. "Be the person you want to meet. If you think you are decent then you should chose a decent partner. A sole decent one. Way more better than me. But before that be one... I can't offend Allah. This haram relationship will bring nothing but ruin to us. It is the commence of our destruction. De facto, we need to step back from our sins to enter the Halal." He pauses and stirs the dusts resting on the ground with his shoe silently; keeping his gaze low. He averrs in broken tone, " If you truly love me, keep remembering me in your prayers. Talk to Allah. If I'm enough good for you He won't let you be despaired. "

And here he stabs me, staight into my feelings.

"Why are you doing this?" I cry harder; my throat dries up. I can't let go of him.