The Shah Gharana

||Samna [Confrontations]||

  بےنام رشتا وہ ,بیچین کرتا جو
ہو نہ سکے جو بیاں
کچھ تو تھا تیرے میرے درمیان

Benaam rishta woh, bechain karta jo
Ho na sake jo byaan
Kuch to tha tere mere darmiyaan

***

Saman's sleep broke when she felt soft caresses on her head. The familiarity and warmth of the touch made her smile. It felt like a dream and so to confirm the reality she opened eyes.

"Papa?"

"Mera bacha." Saman couldn't believe her eyes, this must be a dream. She knew this was a dream. She tried to sit, making her father get up and help her sit. She stared at him with shock. She knew her mind was conjuring this up again. She did not want to believe that this was real.

Lifting her hand slowly she held his hand, cautiously as if fearing that he might disappear. Ihsan held her shivering hand in his.

"Papa!" Saman cried.

"Papa kyu chale gaye the aap."(papa why did you leave) She spoke like a lost child who finally found home. Ihsan wrapped her arms around his daughter whom he had ruthlessly left.

"Forgive me my child, your father is cruel."

"Why did you leave Papa,  you didn't  even listen to me...I...I called you so many times. Why didn't you listen to me?" She spoke in between her sobs. Ihsan didn't stop her, he listened to her every complaint.

"Please forgive your father Saman. I was a fool." Ihsan whispered kissing her head as she cried more and more.

"I am so ashamed of what I had done that I cannot even look in your eyes. I have wronged you my child, I had promised your mothers that whatever happens I will always keep any harm away from you Saman, yet I couldn't save you from my own foolishness. I am so sorry Saman, I am so sorry I don't know what had taken over me. Please forgive your father." Ihsan spoke lowering his head, his voice trembled as he spoke while Saman herself couldn't stop crying.

"Papa...please." She whispered holding his hand in her trembling ones. "Never leave me again like this,that's all I want."

____________

The night had spread its wings long ago yet sleep or calm did not bestow upon Armaan Shah. It was the same for the last few days. He would try to tame the havoc in his mind, and fail...he would try to think properly and fail. He would build courage to go infront of Saman and fail badly.

Armaan might be detached with every other thing around him but not Saman. Even if his whole self was consumed in regret, guilt and he was on the verge of losing his sanity. He was around her during her stay at the hospital, he was around her when she was brought back. He had watched, observed and taken care of her but from a distance.

He thought he did not deserve to be near her, but he had to. He needed to apologize, he needed to tell her that whatever nonsense he had spewed that night was not true. He had to tell her that he was furious over those people who demeaned her, and not on her. Never her.

Armaan had tried multiple times to face her, yet he couldn't find the right time. This was his problem,from always. Searching for the perfect timing he would always lose what was perfect at the moment. He might be a calm and calculative person but he was yet to learn of the way time worked, how time waits for none.