Losing Games

43.

Holy crap this chapter is almost 7k words... highest word count & longest chapter ever... enjoy!

Also, I'm on a roll guys. I've never updated this quickly... be proud of me :)

43.

The Conversation

~*~

Percy POV

It didn't work.

I've tried to kill myself three times now. Three times but still, none of them worked.

They say third times a charm, right? Wrong.

To say I was shocked when I woke up was an understatement. To say I was pissed when all I saw was Drew and Grover was an understatement.

I knew I shouldn't have picked up the call. I knew I shouldn't have said what I said.

But I did. Because I didn't plan on seeing another day. Yet here I was, lying alone in this cold hospital bed.

I was told my heart stopped twice. I was told that I was in critical condition when I got here. I was told that they had to stick a tube down my throat to get the pills that I had overdosed on. I was told that had Terminus not performed CPR when he found me, I would've died.

That pissed me off.

And so I fired him. Or let him go, depending on how you want to take it.

It's not that I hated that he saved me—which part of me definitely did. It's that I knew I was a drag for him. I knew that he could find a job somewhere else and he'd be much happier. And maybe a little part of me hoped that next time I tried, he wouldn't save me. It was selfish but I really was only bringing him down.

My friends visited me. All of them. 

Except Grover.

I was told excuses when I asked where he was. Oh, he's at his grandmothers today. Oh, he's not feeling well today. Oh, he has a formal dinner with his family right now. Oh, he had to walk his goldfish. Oh, he's cheating on Juniper with his goldfish. The last one was from Leo, if you couldn't tell.

I knew they were lying but I didn't say anything. I didn't say anything because I knew the real reason he didn't show up anymore.

He didn't want to see me.

I don't blame him—not at all. He tried so hard to help me and I... I let him down.

I hadn't seen Drew either. She hasn't showed up since that day and it didn't take a genius to figure out why. I had probably traumatized the poor girl.

But anyways, my friends didn't say much. There was a lot of crying when they got here and I felt horrible.

Burden. Baggage. Mistake. Disappointment. Can't even commit suicide right.

They yelled at me for a good hour and then everyone left, leaving me to my thoughts again.

And my parents... let's just say I haven't seen them since I woke up either. And it's been over a week since I woke up.

I know why. They had lost a daughter and their son had tried to kill himself. That was too much for them—well my mom anyways. 

I'd seen Paul one time after that day. He showed up and didn't say much, just sat there beside me as the doctors updated him on my health.